i don't have a very good sense of balance and my dad looks at legs.

have i got your attention yet? :D

at my mom's office right now. since her boss is not around, i am all over her desk 'coz she's someplace tidying up the office.
read: weeeeeeeee~!!!!!!
while i was walking towards pwtc though, i almost walk into a dustbin due to difficulties of turning. ekekekeke! i don't knooowww.. stupid balancing.

and before my dad sent me off to the commuter station, i asked him about his past relationships and what attracts him first about a girl. (spent the whole car journey smiling and giggling) i mean, have you imagined when your parents were young?? looking around.. flirting around.. ekekeke!! it makes me laugh..
anyways! then my dad mentioned about he likes to look at legs, and if it's "pretty" enough.. he'll look up!!!!
HAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAH!!
papa bengong.
that was like.... ewwwwww?!!
what's so great about legs anyways?? i mean, i can understand hair.. and eyes.. and simply the face.. but LEGS??
how about it, boys? what's pretty about legs? is it about how long it is? or how fair?? the shape?? what??? i am absolutely CURIOUS!
and what's more curious is that my mom is only 5 feet! ahahhahaha!! i am laughing 'coz that should rule out the 'long' theory, but then again, papa did say that the day he met mama, she was wearing a 2-inched platform! ahhahahahha!!

okay okay
the holiday has been.. quite uninteresting but i don't seem to be bored by it. after all, i WAS looking forward to it. time away from any stress.. yaaah~ me love!
but i've been left at home with loads of people to miss.. yaaah~ me don't like.
but it's okay.. 'coz i still check on them once in a while. me like that one! :D :D :x
somehow i have a sing-song in my head;
miss ya miss ya
just can't wait to kiss ya~ (repeat once, yah!)
ekekkeke!!
cepatlah hari hari ni berlalu!! missing hobbitses! missing a person!
doesn't matter if they doesn't feel the same way.. 8-}

eyh, tv hasn't been that boring ek?
i mean.. the nights lah, the nights. around the afternoon i am glued to my pc anyways, how should i know. :D
and i just like to state here that.. the melena gurl from average joe is soo.. hyuckk!! she's sooo.. typical! going for looks rather than charm. what's that all about? bimbo! harap muka je lawa! bluerghhh!! me hate people like that!
X( but partly i don't blame her terribly. 'coz you can see that SHE really likes jason and.. well, i think girls can be VERY STUPID when they like someone. they seem to be VERY BLIND about the others who are actually treating her better. i don't know lah.. obviously that's only my opinion.. :D but melena IS stupid!!

been trying to check my results but the page just won't seem to come out!! sheesh~! malaas nak layan! ahahhahaha!! klaka laa.. it's like i'm meant not to know what i get.. (which is half scary!)
ohh, and i'm still in ID after the pointers-checking. (tengkiu ablen!) and BELIEVE IT OR NOT, i think i am staying!!! ho hohh ho! i'm scared, yess.. God knows how much. i mean, i've been into the advertising stuff but now.. i am considering the LAST majoring that i had in mind. wondering.. if i can manage. can i? can i? maybe..
dar cakap ID buat dashboard kereta, which made me laugh.. and realize the second after that he was actually serious. :-S to be quite honest, that was one of the points that really made me scared.. (thoughts: kepalahotakk nak wanie buat dashbod keta?? pinggan!) but i focused and focused (konon nyer) and thought of wondermilk, folio and home interior project (?) in OU. ID kan tuh? the stuff they have there was cool, i hope i get to do cool stuff! :D
*faints*
I HOPE!!
and i usually get trouble when i started hoping.
(and i never learn.. typical!) :)) after all, everyone in the family says that i'm stubborn. hoyehh!! i know i shouldn't exactly be bragging about it, but somehow i am proud to be "stubborn". hahhahahhaha!!

is the blog long enough?
not quite!

i guess it'll probably about 5 to 6 days before i am moving into cyberia.
*jigs*
can't wait to make some noise with the girls!!
but also scared.. yikes!! harapnye takde pape yang tak diingini lah ye!
after all.. i AM bound to hurt people un-noticingly. haiyohh!
and thank God i have people who kept putting up with me.
my favorite favorite people!!
huggssssss!!!

ohh, during the break, i managed to listen to the "songs i've had so long but never heard before"! hehhehe!! and in my opinion, sister hazel is boring but you HAVE to love the lyrics to their songs!
Killing Me Too

Lend me your ear and I'll tell you about the things I fear
Open your heart and I'll tell you why I'm torn apart maybe
Lend me your car and we'll go chase down a falling star
Give me your hand cause it takes that fire to understand

When was the last time you felt high
Oh you were the best I've ever felt
I don't need you fix me
I just want you to listen

It's killing me too
It's so wrong not to be with you
It's getting harder to stay awake
It's killing me too
It stops my heart just to be with you
So listen cause you are the only one who cares to hear

Lend me your time and we'll go somewhere and kill some wine baby
Show me your soul and I'll shine my light where it seems so cold now
Give me your lips and I'll tell you about all the things I miss the most
Open your mind and I'll crawl right up and sleep inside of it

When was the last time you felt high
Oh you were the best I've ever felt
I don't need you fix me
I just want you to listen

It's killing me too
It's so wrong not to be with you
It's getting harder to stay awake
It's killing me too
It stops my heart just to be with you
So listen cause you are the only one who cares to hear

To hear me

lallalalalala lalalalall alalalal alaa alalalala allaal ala alalalal ala alaalalalalalal alalalalalalla alalalalla alallalala ala alala lalalalala laa lala alla alal ala alalal ala lalala!
note: this is what i will be writing when i am getting all that mushy/ pathetic/ helpless/ hopeless/ icky/ yucky and all that sort from now on. (maybe! ahhahahah!!)

okay.
long enough i suppose!
it'll do 'til the school re-opens..
rase gatal nak call orang tapi tak gatal enough. ahhahahaha!!
(knowing me.. you'd know i am actually gatal enough! ahahhahaha!!)
tengkiu mama for reloading my credit!! i've misused it though, since you thought i'd use it to send SMS (so the credit will stay longer) AHHAHAHHAHAHA!!
ps: mama has been pretty amusing through out the school break, i wonder how! but i like!!

update: checked my results at nina's office desk! (what a wonderful thing.. having 2 family members in the same building. ekekkeke!) it wasn't pretty. :-S [1:28 pm]

another ps: bila ptptn nak masok nieeeeeeee???!!!

star star star

hahhahahhahahaha!!

how stupid can i get.

briefcase.
nak nangis sbb terharu sangat.

i wish i never get too emotional over/on you again. i'd always feel lame and "less" in the end 'coz you're simply amazing if compared to me...... haiyyohh~

tak aci btol.
b-(
>:D<

you can't get to heaven

if you're scared of getting high

that's what kylie minogue said, anyways!
but getting high is not what i am afraid of.. it's HEIGHTS that i'm terrified of!!
:-S
went to GENTING HIGHLANDS with the hobbitses and mamat hiphop ilsa! :))
went off around 8 and got at the theme park around 10 ? heehee..
spent the road journey sleeping since i had a loong night :-S and then came the part where it freaks me out the most. CABLE CAR!!!! arrrghhhh!! tension btol naik menda alah tuu.. i went all rigid and stiff in there!! grrr! it was freakin' HIGHHH i tell you!! REALLY!!! so sooo high!!!! i don't know what'll exactly happen if the car falls off.. IT WAS HIGH!!!!!

okay.. when we get to the theme park, i slipped on this mat with the waters coming out from the ground. it was lame.. i was trying to act like a kid who gets all excited about the water (which i really was,) and started to run towards it.. and when i tried to stop before hitting the water.. my right foot slipped to the front and my butt almost hit the ground..! but well, i am a professional klutz lahh, i can catch my own fall! ahhahahaha!! b-(
anyways, the first ride we got onto was the space shot!! also known as the solero shot. :D it's the thrill ride that picks you up until.. 10 storey's high ? and lets you just faaall... and goes up again.. and faaall again.. aiyohh.. the idea was really.. FREAKIN' SCARY!!! ilsa didn't get on it with the reason; heart problem! hahhaha! well, he's been on that ride before, so he may be excused lah! as for the 5 of us, (lily, prisc, drogo, me and rosie) we've never been on it! the line was a while.. but i think.. IT'S WORTH IT!!!! the freakin' scary ride happened to be FUN as well!! hahhahahaha!! it was honestly.. SCARY! REAAALLY!! REALLY REAAALLLY SCARY!! my butt didn't touch the seat when we were falling. what an adrenaline rush. screamed like crazy.. aaa!! o my god o my god!! gilaaaaaaa!!! aaaaaa!! o my god!! hahahhaha!!
me, rosie and drogo actually enjoyed the ride.. while lily and prisc said they wouldn't want to go on it again. ekekkeke!

okay, we did got onto some other rides but i don't think they're worth reading for. hehhehe! they're woth while for the experience though.. so go ahead!! the rides were funn!! (if you're with your friends, especially)

not so long after the space shot, jai and ery came and joined us. aiyohhh! it was good for rosie, of course! but but... that leaves me and ery out who's not a couple in the group!!! aiyooooohhhhh!!!! b-( curse moments like those!! urrghh.. takmo lagi!! i spent most of my time tagging lily with ilsa or prisc and drogo though.. hahhahaha!! :)) sori lah encik ery! :))
o yeah, so happens that drogo's parents were also there to celebrate their silver anniversary. (waaah!!) and they paid for our lunch :-S thank you uncle auntyy~!!! drogo's mom gave me a prep talk before we said our goodbyes. aiyooohhhh!! 8-} thank you auntyyy!! i really liked the sound of the advice! hahahhaha!! :)

then to get back here... yeah, another cable car ride!! and i was like.. okehh!! if i can handle space shot, this should be fine! hahahhaha!! and then when the car moved, i realized.. HOW UNTRUE!!! aiyooohhh!! i am still afraid of heights! :-S grrr.. :)) ekkekeke!

getting back to my room was actually the best part of the day, though. two reasons.
one, i was freakin' tired and i NEED the rest!!
two, what was waiting for me on the computer. *sigh* i just keep getting more impressed on how you handle everything. why laaah you're sooo nice to me?? kan daaahh!! grrr.. geram betul!! b-( >:D<
errr.. i don't know if it's appropriate to post the lyrics of this song right after the statement above since well.. it may sound too extreme maybe? but i am loving this song anyways!! (me like laa 70's beats!!) been listening to the pop idol; Michelle McManus' version though..:)
If I Can't Have You by The Bee Gees

Don't know why I'm surviving every lonely day
When there's got to be no chance for me
My life would end and it doesn't matter how I cry
My tears of love are a waste of time if I turn away

Am I strong enough to see it through?
Go crazy is what I will do
If I can't have you, I don't want nobody baby
If I can't have you, ah hah hah ah
If I can't have you, I don't want nobody baby
If I can't have you, ah hah hah ah

Can't let go and it doesn't matter how I try
I gave it all so easily to you my love
To dreams that never will come true
Am I strong enough to see it through?
Go crazy is what I will do
If I can't have you, I don't want nobody baby
If I can't have you, ah hah hah ah
If I can't have you, I don't want nobody baby
If I can't have you, ah hah hah ah

ohh, tengkiu kak yan for the notes!!! >:D<
okay. got to eat.. or sleep.. or clear out my things. lily will be helping me to get my stuff back to home tomorrow!! (later today) >:D<

cuti sekolah!

last post for the month!! (hopefully :)))
gonna pull out all the cables and wires in a while.. gonna send all my stuff back home. goodbye hostel~! adeh..
really gonna miss this room. i am truly blessed while i was in this room. seems like there's always a bit of luck in my messy life. (read: luck = love) God still loves meee!! :x (pandai pandaaai je cakap! perasan btol! -but i DO believe that, so if you think the opposite.. SEE IF I CARE! hahahhahaha!-)
maaan, i actually should start to care what people think!..at least a bit! hahhahaha!

anyways!! what had this year been? umm.. BETA was.. *blush* somehow i can only remember one thing.. a face to be exact! *blush even more* HAHH! FIKIR APE AA?? i was thinking of chematto laaaaa!! hahhaha!! :P beta was soo full of rejection.. insecurities.. fury.. (okay, i am not talking ONLY about work, now) but it all turns swell in the end. doesn't it?

beta has been great with friends. (read: friends = gits that makes you forget) melalaikan, yess! but my life has always been about friends. if you think it shouldn't be that way.. SEE IF I CARE! hahhahaha!!! i am truly addicted to friends since i was in school. and loving it!! :) sure we had some topsy-turvy but it all turns swell at the end. doesn't it?
(waaahh! how confident am i to talk about this??)
okaay, i guess my greatest fear of all is losing my loved ones. family.. friends.. so i really shouldn't be too confident on that, now. but if i were to lose them, i know.. i was once loved, and i am confident with that! :)

beta has also been very stupid for me. well, not stupid stuupid.. but.. well.. something like that! my indesiveness can't get me nowhere, lalalalalaaa~

o well, that's life! you live.. you learn! and everyone is lucky in their own way.. if you can't see that with your eyes, try open up your heart. if both ways doesn't help, hit your head really hard.. 'coz you're actually even more stupid that i am!

All This Time by Michelle Mcmanus

This time yesterday,
I thought I was gonna die,
Standing at the edge, of my ordinary life.
Now I am looking far ahead,
I only see clear blue skies,
Hope this feeling lasts me, until the end of time.

Now I don't see the things that bring me down like I used to.
No, and there were times where we felt like giving up but we came through.

All this time, we've come a long a long way
I waited a life time for today
I’m praying this moment’s here to stay
All this time, when everyone else said I was wrong
You gave me your reason to be strong
You gave me the will to carry on, All this time.

You kiss my blues away,
My yesterdays far behind,
And all these clouds of doubt, have cleared around my mind,
Now I’m looking far ahead,
I'm looking with brand new eyes,
Well, I can't see the future, but I know it’s looking bright

Never thought that we could survive what we’ve came through,
No, and there were times we felt like giving up but we had to. (?)

All this time, we've come a long a long way
I waited a life time for today
I’m praying this moment’s here to stay
All this time, when everyone else said I was wrong
You gave me your reason to be strong
You gave me the will to carry on, All this time.

It’s like a second chance at life,
So many people passing by,
and you know it's a shame ‘cause they can't believe
so they don't and they wont even try.
With every battle that's been won,
With every little thing I’ve done
What I couldn't see, It's now clear to me.

All this time, We've come a long a long way
I waited a life time for today
I am praying this moment is here to stay
All this time, We've come a long a long way
I waited a life time for today
I am praying this moment is here to stay
All this time, when everyone else said I was wrong
You gave me a reason to be strong
You gave me the will to carry on
All this time

so!
HAPPY HOLS PEEPS~!
hope you'll have fun through the 3 weeks break!!
maaaannn i am SO going to miss some of you! *hugs* (*gedebikk* then *hugs*)

if you'll excuse me.. gonna turn off this computer and send it back home. i'll be at rosie's if you need me. until monday aje tapinye! ekekekek!
see ya' in 3 weeks time!

geram nyee..
wanie nak marah sebenanye, tapi wanie tak patut maraahhh..
sket sket camni! sket sket camni!!
wanie pon nak naik menyampaahhh!!

nak say sori pon manyampah gak sebab wanie dah rasa ape yang wanie rasa.
tapi kalau wanie tak rasa ape yang wanie rasa.. i wouldn't really be wanie, kan?

urghhhh!!
wanie budak bodo!
cepatlaa genting!

..sebab saye tak marah

bezanye dengan post kak yan yang marah, wanie tengah tak marah. tapi wanie pon nak juge buat esei pasal kenape wanie tak marah. ganti balek sebab esei semalam wanie buat empat line sahaje.

saye tak marah sebab pelbagai sebab. antaranye sebab saye tahu saye takde power untuk control semua perkara kat dunia ni. life sendiri tak terjaga, ade hati nak cuba control life orang lain. saye tak marah rumets saye walaupon diorang suka usik saye harini sebab saye akan rindukan diorang. lepas ni tak duduk sebilik ngan diorang. siape lagi nak wanie usik pasal pembolot lelaki sedunia - kak siti, ngan kak mai - makcik tua sebab dia suka cakap sorang sorang. wanie tak marah pon sebab tengok dia jadi klaka. wanie tak marah walaupon wanie sakit dada, penat batuk sebab sebenanye salah wanie jugak. gatal masuk tempat tempat sejuk, mandi tengah malam, pastu tak makan ubat. padan muka wanie, tak guna marah. wanie tak marah pasal hal majoring sebab wanie dah nampak the silver lining. alah, kenape nak marah pasal tu, kalo ikut CGPA.. sape suh tak stadi elok elok. tau nak main ajee.. kenape nak main? sebab main main besttt!! jadi, kenape nak marah? kan best! ekkekeke! wanie tak marah wanie stuck kat blek sepanjang malam sebab wanie tak sehat. lagipon kak mai ngan kak siti nak balek harini so, memang elok bahijah gi kuar dating ngan ilsa. kalo tak musti wanie gatal ajak dia kuar, pastu tak dapat nak spend time ngan rumets wanie nihh. wanie tak marah barang wanie banyak, tak tahu bila nak start kemas pon.. sebab wanie mengade bawak banyak siapa suhh! lagipon nanti leh tinggalkan kat umah asha aje. kenape nak marah kan? nyamuk dok gigit wanie pon wanie tak marah. okaylaa, ade laa menyampah sket sebab wanie dah kurang darah, dia nak laie darah wanie.. tapi dia pon nak idup. pape hal pon wanie lagi kuat dari dia. tampa aje kan senang. wanie tak marah majin merepek kata wanie balek lambat sebab tunggu orang. wanie rasa menda tu klaka sebab wanie patut gi jalan nanti ngan kawan kawan. wanie tak marah sebab ade satu benda ni bakal kutip habuk nanti sebab wanie tak dapat nak hulur benda tu kat orang yang wanie nak hulurkan menda tu. tapi dia tak nak kot, so wanie takmo pakse dia amek. lagipon menda tu merepek aje, nape wanie nak kasi sangat pon wanie tak tahu. gatal nak mengade lebih. hahhahahah!!

merepek la wanie nie. wanie kata wanie tak marah, tapi kalau wanie bace balek ape wanie taip ni, sebenanye bunyiknye wanie ni tengah geram gak kat some benda.
ohh! wanie geram sebab wanie tak tahu cemane cara nak buat orang faham kita without kita bagitau dia. penaaat! so wanie givap.. wanie givap, okeh?

dahlaa.. wanie sebenanye bukan nak buat post ni jadi bunyik camni. sorri la kalau bunyik macam wanie tak puas hati.. wanie okay aje. tapi sebab dah pagi buta and wanie takmo tido laie.. and wanie tak tahu nak buat ape selain blogging menda merepek camnie. sorry ek! i didn't mean to.
selamat malam~!

Nobody Better Lay a Finger on my Bucuk.

click!

World Filled With Love by Craig David

Saw some pictures in the paper,
of a girl I'd met the day before.
I couldn't believe that hours later,
I had reporters knockin at my door,
But I used to dream about,
the life I'm living now and,
I didn't think I'd miss those things from the past,
and I'm not afraid of leaving,
or letting go of what I had,
cause I realize that now there's no turning back.

Cause I'm caught living in a world filled with love,
so when tear drops fall from me like rain from above,
I can brush my troubles away,
know that deep down inside,
I got sun shining in my life.

I used to think I could get better,
my girlfriends always used to get me wrong.
Some just sent messages, love letters,
but those kinda feelings never lasted long.
Cause now the only love I find's within a castle made of sand,
and when the tide goes out it's swept away.
Though I got my peace of mind,
and time is firmly on my side,
and through the battles I can safely say...

Cause I'm caught living in a world filled with love,
so when tear drops fall from me like rain from above,
I can brush my troubles away,
know that deep down inside,
I got sun shining in my life.

Cause I mean I'm caught living in a world filled with love,
so when tear drops fall from me like rain from above,
I can brush my troubles away,
know that deep down inside,
I got sun shining in my life.

especially for my sunshines
dearest family..
and my 3 school buddies.. my favorite 4 hobbitses..
and another favorite person!

>:D<

can't help but being transparent about these sort of things.

i don't know what to think.

honestly dizzy. thinking too much about sillly things.. like, three suku kata word!
8-}
i don't know, knowing that it'll be school break seems to make me VERY restless about SOME things. sorry.
:-S

was asleep in the afternoon.. until
lily came to my bed and start singing a song for meeee :x
wanie ta.. wanie ta.. wanie taa..
hahahhaha!! i swear, if i wasn't as sleepy and i had something semi-hard in my hand, i'd throw it at her! hahhahahahhaa!! the song was absolutely a dizzy-maker. i don't think it'd make the top ten list. hehhe!
but it was nice.. the fact that lily reminds me of home 'coz dida would usually wake me up by making up some noisee. heehee..
>:D<

it had been twice in two days that my life was threatened. lily and ilsa are both HORRIBLE drivers!! they're REALLY horrible!! i've never felt so close to pain before. haiyyooo~ korang ni lain kali tolong bawak keta elok elok sket, okehh! TOLONG! takuuuuttt!!

kak maisarah said something.. scary about an hour ago. and i don't know who's to blame for it to turn that way... i am spooked. i wish i didn't say anything about anyone around this room 'coz this is plaaaain scary for me...

okay.. feeling very dizzy. most probably from the lack of sleep. @_@
plus.. i have a baaad feeling about something so i better leave the desk before it REALLY turns bad.

blood seems to rush away.

tengah bad mood.
worried.. worried.. and there's a pain in my chest.
(no, rosie.. my breasts aren't getting any bigger and lily, don't go cheekily rubbing 'em like you're trying to calm my chest! hahhahahaha!! kamu sumer gilok!)

worry #1.. unexplainable. i'm.. i'm... hoping on something before it's too late.. i.. i am.. really hoping that at least.. before everyone goes back to their home.. two seconds.. i.. i... don't know. haihhhh~!!

worry #2.. our majoring will be according to our CGPAs. yeahh.. FANTASTIC! (not!!) i am all stiff from all this. somehow i forget to get all excited about anything. 'coz i am thinking about my two siblings..
nina took IT, while dida took engineering. and both of them are not working according to the course they took. they're doing absolutely fine! but of course, nina purposedly asked for an admin job 'coz she said IT was boring! hehhehe.. while dida, she's ready to do anything as long as she gets paid, and now she's doing a logistic job! hahhahahaha!! so now i am feeling lucky to have two sisters above me. :) as long as i don't get stupid VR or FA (pardon me for calling it stupid.. i absolutely dispise the two) i will be up for it! but of course, i'd prefer MI more than anything! :D 'coz now that i think of it.. "so what if i am forced to take ID! i am capable of doing MI and DM works.. and in this sort of industry.. my portfolio will be the one that matters most! i could just throw in some advertising stuff and walaaah~ i am MULTI-TALENTED!" woohooo~!
i am also talented in recognizing a chinese, japanese and korean from one another! ohh i make myself proud!! :))
take the test over here! hehhe.. i got 11 out of 18!! oooh~
can't believe that i got all eyes-open in one night. :))

chest pain.. please don't throw me into cold places this time around.. :-S hurts like.. errr.. (never been to hell) it just hurts very much!! :( i reaaaaaaaally don't think it'd be good for me to go to cold places, as much as i wanted to. stop laa cough.. enough enouughhh!!! X(

thoughts thoughts..
wondering off again..

spent 45 minutes on my objective this morning 'coz i can't focus. grrr! and another 15 minutes crapping for the essay. :)) it was honestly the worst, most brutal paper i've ever done. but i am not regretting, somehow. haaaaiihhh~ i think what's simply stupid about me is that i just have to be the extreme. (takde wasati'ah) it's whether i liiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiike it so much, or i HATE it absolutely. about things lahh :D

sleepy. really in need of sleep. ohh! i thank kak siti for waking me up this morning.. or i would've probably be absent for the test!! :)) tengkiuuuuuuuu!!
gonna try to get some sleep.. but i am probably too worried to even rest.

there's everybody else.. and then there is you....

stop this freakin cough... please.

still coughing madly.
God!! can't wait to get home (sunday, probably) and get pampered! ahhahahaha!!
feeling all better now, despite i couldn't get a single minute of shut-eye since the last post.

i hope this cough will get better or i don't think i should get to anywhere..
cold places especially... (umm, you hobbitses catch my drift? :-S)

just downloaded this song.. ekekke! i know i said i hated avril.. and i still do (i don't really know why, exactly..) but crap lah, 'coz i like the verse.. i mean, it sounded cute.. hehe! (the tune) and the music sounded kinda girly did you notice?
Don't Tell Me by Avril Lavigne

You held my hand and walked me home, I know
Why you gave me that kiss
it was something like this
and made me go, oh oh
You wiped my tears
got rid of all my fears
why did you have to go
Guess it wasn't enough
to take up some of my love
guys are so hard to trust

Did I not tell you that I'm not like that girl
the one who gives it all away

Did you think that I was gonna give it up to you [this time]
Did you think that it was something I was gonna do [and cry]
Don't try to tell me what to do
Don't try to tell me what to say
You're better off that way

Don't think that you're charming
the fact that your arm is now around my neck
Won't get you in my pants
I'll have to kick your ass
and make you never forget
I'm gonna ask you to stop
thought I liked you a lot
but I'm really upset [I'm really upset]
Get outta my head
Get off of my bed
Yeah that's what I said

Did I not tell you that I'm not like that girl
the one who throws it all away

Did you think that I was gonna give it up to you [this time]
Did you think that it was something I was gonna do [and cry]
Don't try to tell me what to do
Don't try to tell me what to say

This guilt-trip that you put me on
won't mess me up I've done no wrong
Any thoughts of you and me have gone away

[You're better off that way]
I'm better off alone anyway

maaan, i hope i'll never memorize the lyrics. enough with arep giving me testi that i can sing like avril! AHHAHAHA!! *gedebikk* tak tahan.. (can't help myself from talking 'bout that mamat whenever i think of avril.. the fact that HE'S the one that sings like her!!!!! rai fail disitu.. ekekkekeke!!)
ehh alamaaaakk.. humm.. nvm nvm :D

okay.. it's almost 5.. and i can't sleep.. haven't read a single line of digital animation.. coughing like crazy.. smiling to myself.. amusing myself.. singing stupidly.. doing almost everything in the list of USELESS as i watch the time ticks away..
yeahh.. i am still ME despite everything that's happening around me.

thank you to the lovelies that has been putting up with me.. >:D< you guys really shouldn't spoil me this way :))
you peeps know who you guys are.. ;)
i guess life is still treating me nicely. :D

ohh, sedikit pesanan;
belilah majalah KLUE isu terbaruu~
okay shahnon, kamon pay me for the advertisement! ekekkeke

unlucky thursday.

well, not really unlucky.. but i don't know why i am having this HUGE bad feeling that just lingers inside.

friends.. God knows how much i adore themm!
and i guess they saw some else different from the thing i see from where i am currently standing.
thank you for caring.
wish i can say more than that..
*scream* (yeah, i got my voice back in the afternoon)

...honestly i didn't plan on typing this stuff out but current happenings made me...

adohh beratnya rasa di hati.

if i were to ask you;
what are you turning me into??
would there possibly an answer?

*sigh* yeah, i don't think so too..

three songs in two weeks..
Kay Hanley - You Don't See Me
Buckcherry - For The Movies
Sophie Ellis Bextor - I Am Not Good At Not Getting What I Want
thanks hobbitses!
i should consider myself lucky to get this much attention from you three.. and yeah, including drogo! :)

God, how i wish i have someone or at least something human-sized to hug right at this moment.....

went out with rosie, lily and her friends in the afternoon. had food. good.
i should study for tomorrow's final paper. i promised myself that.. but i don't think i am capable of doing much at the moment. sleep.. that's what i should do. logoff my messenger, turnoff my darned phone.. leaving me to clear this much crowded head and heavy heart.

ohh.. the faculty is going to release a new majoring list according to add-drop of subjects.
whatever.

i find cursing is not the answer.

but i did curse some bits.. :D

sorry.. tadi geram, sebut kau.
sorry hobbitses.. you three had to endure me said the animal.
fcm is indeed, tonyok!

i was at a high point of fury.. 'til i messaged dida and what did she replied?

amek je la. mebi ada sbb ALLAH x bg. Atleast ko still di bg blajo. Sabo.

i was about to reply, kau gile hapee?? but i actually just laughed..
haihhh.. didaaa didaaa.. you and your skolah pondok! ekekkekeke! :P

so majin got MI.
me, bahijah, dar, amri, ina, fina would probably be stuck in ID.
ana and ablen did got DM, along with a reluctant asha and nana.
ayako and azarul got VR. ekkekee! (sorry for laughing :|)
FA.. who got FA? fariz, you got aa?

aaaaand i just got a call from nina..
haihhhh.. i miss my siblings a lot. skolah pondok or not. ekkekeke!

so now, if you're surprised to see that i didn't spend the whole blog cursing.. well, so do i! but it seems that too many people are cursing right now, and i still have my lovely friends around.. maybe.. MAYBE i can put up with the stupid major.

ablen: so. wanie rela ke tak amek ID tu
me: kalau tak rela wanie ade choice ke?
me: nak mati, cam awal sangat
me: nak pindah limkokwing, mahal sangat
me: nak kawen, takde calon ngan tak readi
me: nak duk umah je, saye mati gak laa. sbb bosan

almost crying

JUNE! come on quick!!!
cepat cepaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaatttt!!!
i won't care if none of my friends is around at that time, but me want to see HARRY POTTER!!!!
(i'd really love to see 50 First Dates but lily has already seen it and prisca would probably want to see it with drogo. :-S)
but as i said.. if no one's around by JUNE 4th.. screw them!! ahhahahha!!
wanna see HARRY POTTER AND THE PRISONER OF AZKABAN!!
:((
JUNE! cepaaaaaaaaaaaaaaattt!!

just saw the trailer (and i did cry watching the teaser a month ago) and i can't help wanting to see it soooo bad!!!
me wanna me wannaaaa!!!
tom felton (draco malfoy) and.. err.. the one that plays ron (can't remember his real name, omg!) have grown some bits.. hehhe! while emma watson and dan radcliffe were seen adoringly good looking! (i do think emma is pretty!)
tapi ape nieeee!! dalam trailer ade hermione pegang tangan ron.. buat ape wehh!! X( (sorry, me like hermione with harry! :)) )
aaah~ me like hermione.. heehee! you should see the trailer!! well, if you read the book, you'll understand lah why i like some parts so much! :D :D
"that felt good"
ohh and there's that part when harry's face was smacked to the window.. heehee! i think it looked extraordinarily/funnily cute! hahhahahahahhahaha!!

and i also spent the night reading to the trascript of rowling's chat on world book day festival, and she's still writing the 6th installment.. *silent scream, still* cepat laaaaaaaaa!!

my voice still won't come out normally. hope it will by friday morning. *sigh*

my band my band my band

ekkekeke.. kinda addicted to D12's song. really like that boyband part! tak tahan btol! :))
would want to post the whole lyrics but they curse too TOO much!!
but i LOVEEEEE this part!!

girl why can't you see you're the only one for me
and it just tears my a$$ apart to know that
you don't know my baaaaannnndddd~

man, f* this!
*gedishh!*

hahhahahha!! really love that part! :))

anyways.. since it's april.. and it's gonna be school break soon, (and my other friends have changed their layout! exception to lily though :P) i decided to do a new layout!!
well, not an original idea though.. kinda stole the looks of ingram hill's wallpaper. heehee~!
and what better picture should i put up, other than my favorite friends? :D :D
*bodek lagi*

liking the layout!!
liking moi friends!!
liking a guy!!
liking the coming school break!! :))
not liking the non-existant voice though.. heehee :P

-----------------------

suara ilaaaaaaang!! :((
aaaah my beautiful voice :))

mama called me and i can't speak anything with her!!
i truly just lost my voice..
(ahaa~ so this is how it feels when you lose your voice)
i truly truly can't speak about anything right now.
*silent scream*

:((
[11:07 am]

"lil' miss happening" and friends

laughing and laughing 'til i get myself hoarse.

omg!! i just realized that i was practically out for whole 11 hours! ekekkeke!!
time just flies when you're surrounded by great company :D *wink*

okay.. i am still having my cough (though proudly i say that i managed to hold it down while i was in the exam hall! :D) and i don't think it's getting better anytime soon.
was fasting with lily today.. and around 5:30 i just decided to tag her along to see her bestfriends, aine and mardiana.. mardeeana? (don't know the right spelling and i'm sure lily will correct me anytime soon :D) if i didn't, well.. it'll be quite a lonely breakfast for me! :-S
so, after picking up aine in PJ, we headed to KLCC and met up with mar/dee ?? (honestly i don't know what to call that girl)
i have to say.. they're quite a different crowd i get with, but it's not bad at all!! menariiik actually. :D and i get to see lily among her old friends. hehhheh! ohh btw, they're LOUD!! did anyone noticed that? ekkekeke! i think if i see them more often, i'd be screaming around just as same.. :))
after having dinner, we got to uncle don's with these guys; azam and amirul tagging along. hehhhehe! me got to meet lots of people lah today! there, we were joined by prisca and drogo (poor rosie couldn't come along from her fever! :-S get well soon, makcikk! :D >:D<) and then there was also palen and hafiz and their friends. got to see the much-talked-about ilsa.. with akmal stopping by to say hi.. blablablaaa.. not so sure if the whole list interests you peeps who's reading this. :D
ended up watching football, arsenal vs. chelsea (or is it the other way round?) and ended up sort-of betting who will win. me, lily and azam said arsenal would win while prisc and aine said chelsea. hehhehe.
well, wasn't able to see the match end but when me, prisc and drogo left, arsenal just scored a goal!! hahhahahaa!
so now i'm back here in my room. wondering how the match ended and how the night has been awesome with my favorite friends. and i am also wondering what sleepyhead has been up to tonight. :-S
(sorry, you're not really a 'sleepyhead' but i assume that you've already slept and i don't know what else i should call you by. :D ngeee)

my voice is sounding kinda funny than the usual.. :))
now that it's almost 5, i might probably spend the whole tomorrow sleeping. :D
no plans for tomorrow, so i probably get on with my last week's to-do's. heehee~
had a great time.. thanks lily! thanks prisc and drogo!! (rosie, GET WELL SOON!!)

supposedly i have something else to say, but i forgot! bluerthhhhh!
so now, i better pee and then get to sleep! :))

rugi takde digicam tonight. :(

ohh remembered!! LP guy isn't working in uncle don's anymore.. :( but it's okaaay.. that abang yang macam azarul tu still ade! me like watching him *hint* (ekekekekkee!!) but he never smiled back.. hummph! ade gurlfren kot! heeheee!

craning my neck.. for some reasons

paper went terrible!!
hahahhahahha!!
i know.. i AM laughing simply because i am ME. :D :D
but that's not the point..
the point is somewhere else.. i can't see.. ??
and that is also not the point.. the point is.. I LOVE THIS SONG!!
i think it sounds cute.. (though the lyrics are a bit.. ? ehem)
but heck! STILL LOVE IT!!

Just A Little While by Janet Jackson

Baby, I like it when it feels this good
You always seem to make me smile
Can't nobody do what you do
When you love me just a little while

I, I know you got somewhere to go
And I got somewhere to be right now
I'll make 'em wait all day long
If you wanna get a little wild

I dont want to be a distraction to you
No no no
So maybe I'll just lay around
Play by myself
While touching on my favorite fruit
Ooh ooh ooh ooh

Can't stop thinking bout the things we do
And how it feels making love to you
I'm ready to get it baby
If you got it do it then shout
Just love me for a little while

I wanna make it like a dream for you
Turn every fantasy into the truth
You know I'll take it anywhere
That you wanna go right now
Just to love ya for a little while

I, I like sleeping in your clothes
To smell you makes it all come down
When I think about me and you
Sometimes I get a little loud

Baby, I know we did it all night long
And I didn't wanna burn you out
Cause you know how much I like to do it
In the morning it's another round

I don't know if you have other things to do
No no no
So maybe I'll just lay around
Play by myself
While touching on my favorite fruit
Ooh ooh ooh ooh

Can't stop thinking bout the things we do
And how it feels making love to you
I'm ready to get it baby
If you got it do it then shout
Just love me for a little while

I wanna make it like a dream for you
And turn every fantasy into the truth
You know I'll take it anywhere
That you wanna go right now
Just love ya for a little while

My passion flows like a river that has no end
I wanna know everything you'll let me do to you
Ooh ooh ooh ooh

Tell me what you like baby
(Ooh ooh ooh ooh)
Do you wanna play with my strawberries
(Ooh ooh ooh ooh)
Sometimes I think about me and you
(Ooh ooh ooh ooh)
I can get real loud (Ooh ooh ooh ooh)

Can't stop thinking bout the things we do
And how it feel making love to you
I'm ready to get it baby
If you got it do it then shout
Just love me for a little while

I wanna make it like a dream for you
Turn every fantasy into the truth
You know I'll take it anywhere
That you wanna go right now
Just to love ya for a little while

Just love me for a little while

hahhaha!! see seee! the lyrics are kinda.. *eeek!* material, but i love the song anyways!! (would actually bold out some other lines.. but then you guys think of menda ape lak kan.. ekkekeke!)

still awake

obviously.

and there's a full moon outside..
and it usually gets me acting funny. usually. not tonight though.

just got back from an outing with the hobbitses..
kinda wish i'm still outside somehow. :P
humm.. practically i just wished to catch pneumonia since it's freezin' outside!!
well, at least it is for me - a girl who's lacking of many things such as FAT! hahhahahhahaha!! :))
maybe perlu menggemukkan diri time cuti nanti.

banyak menda sebenanye kene buat time cuti nanti.
a check-up is in my long list of to-do's, but heck! i haven't even completed last week's list! heeheee!

having my thoughts on.... guess! ekekkeke! :P
heard this song while we were in the car :)
The Freshmen by Verve Pipe

When I was young I knew everything
She's a punk who rarely ever took advice
Now I'm guilt stricken sobbing with my head on the floor
Stop a babies breath and a shoeful of rice, No

Can't be held responsible
Cause she was touching her face
I won't be held responsible
She fell in love in the first place

For the life of me
I can not remember
What made us think that we were wise and we never compromise
For the life of me
I can not believe we'd ever die
For these sins
We were merely freshmen

My best friend took a week's vacation to forget her
His girl took a week worth of Valium and slept
And now he's guilt stricken sobbing with his head on the floor
Thinks about her now and how he never really wept he says

Can't be held responsible
Cause she was touching her face
I won't be held responsible
She fell in love in the first place

For the life of me
I can not remember
What made us think that we were wise and we never compromise
For the life of me
I can not believe
We'd ever die for these sins
We were merely Freshmen

We tried to wash our hands of all of this
We never talk of our lack in relationships
And how we're guilt stricken sobbing with our heads on the floor
We fell through the ice
When we tried not to slip
We'd say

Can't be held responsible
Cause she was touching her face
And I won't be held responsible
She fell in love in the first place

For the life of me
I can not remember
What made us think that we were wise and we'd never compromise
For the life of me
I can not believe we'd ever die for these sins
We were merely Freshmen
For the life of me
I can not remember what made us think that we were wise
and we'd never compromise
For the life of me
I can not believe we'd ever die for these sins
We were merely Freshmen
We were merely Freshmen
We were only Freshmen...

still have plenty to read on, but i should rest some bit. so,
goodnight dearest~!

this was drew in The Calling's video. :D me liiike laaaaa!! ekkekekeke!! you should ask lily how much i like this guy. been talking about him every chance i get! hahhahahaha!! :)) (amazing btol.. no matter whether he has short or long hair.. it just falls into the right places.. haihhh :x)
me still kepingin rhumba. more than a month since i last had it, i think!

down with a sickness

not really bad.. but i'm not really fond of it.

a punishment for being unreasonable?
probably.

me and lily just got back from a late dinner.. and meeting up those guys we met in a&w last week. me don't like that moon guy very much.. i hope he understands.. :))
i have this perfect saying on him, though..
an empty barrel makes the loudest noise
heehee.. i'm not a very nice person.. i knoooww..!

have to start reading up something for tomorrow's (later today) paper.
..and yet, me and the girls are already planning for an a&w trip a bit later.. ekkekeke

i think of a 100 things you could do..

and you did just one..


and that is enough.. :D


aiiyaiiyaiiyaiiyaaiii~
*tuk*

sorry
sorry
:P
sorry

benci tau camnieee.. when my ego goes off at the wrong time.. bluerthhh!
sendiri yang rugi..
:P
rugi ke?
humm...

what i really wanted to say was..
happy belated birthday to you..
the moment has passed so i have nothing for you.. actually i still do.. but. hummph!
tanak kasi :P

i lied.
i always find one reason to stick around. :P

eeeeeeeeeeeeeeee geraaaaaaaaaammmmm!!
macam.. macam.. nak cekik orang
geram geram geraaaaaaaaaaaaaamm!!

tapi sukaaa
*sengih gatal disini*
ekkekekekeke!

still geram.
:P

b-( *gedebikk* wanie yang mengadee

ps= you see where this is heading? NOWHERE!! i am starting to run in circles again lah (i assume) and i just can't stop.. haiyyo! (at least not yet!) can't stop from inflicting hurt to myself again lah, me.. *gedebikk* lagi skali.

weekend was fine, by the way. :D

because you'll always have someone else to go to..

so there's no reason for me to stick around.


at least i can't find a reason any longer.





sorry.
i lied.


april fools..?

pinch me

or better yet, punch me!
i need help!!
i know i brought all this upon myself.. but this is getting way out of my hands!!
*scream*

if things aren't so.......
if i'm not so........ i'd just....... !!
i wish........... but seems like it's all i can do!!!
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!

yeah, that depression is coming back to me now.
now i remember how it feels.
i can't believe myself for being too carried away over this..

i don't need someone who's gonna tell me, 'i told you so,'
i really don't need that right now.
especially right at this moment.. when every single thing that has been said to me is repeating in my head.
i really don't need this.

i am so tired of running around in circles.. but i just do. no matter how far i tried to run.. i keep coming back to the place where i started. i am freakin' tired!!
so help me God..

in conclusion.. i may scream inside here for help.. but outside, please don't mention anything about it.. at least not in front of me. my hope has receded into a pea.
not so thrilled about anything or anyone any longer.
unless a miracle happen.. i think i'm gonna let my story unfinished.

Come Undone by Duran Duran

Mine immaculate dream
Made breath and skin
I've been waiting for you

Signed with a home tattoo
Happy birthday to you
Was created for ya

Can't ever keep from falling apart, at the seams
Can't I believe you're taking my heart, to pieces

Oh, it'll take a little time
Might take a little crime
To come undone now

We'll try, to stay blind
To the hope and fear outside
Hey child, stay wilder
Than the wind and blow me in to cry

Who do you need
Who do you love, when you come undone
Who do you need
Who do you love, when you come undone

Words playing me déjà-vu
Like a radio tune
I swear I've heard before

Chills is it something real
Or the magic I'm feeding
Off your fingers

Can't ever keep from falling apart, at the seams
Can't I believe you're taking my heart, to pieces

Lost in a snow filled sky
We'll make it alright
To come undone now

We'll try, to stay blind
To the hope and fear outside
Hey child, stay wilder
Than the wind and blow me in to cry

Who do you need
Who do you love, when you come undone
Who do you need
Who do you love, when you come undone
Who do you need
Who do you love, when you come undone
(Can't ever keep from falling apart)
Who do you need
Who do you love, when you come undone
When you come undone (can't ever keep from falling apart)
Who do you need
Who do you love (can't ever keep from falling apart)
Who do you need
Who do you love, when you come undone
(can't ever keep from falling apart)

now if you'll excuse me.. i have some major outburst to tend.

i.. am.. officially..

bored !!

not about drew, no!! :p
and despite i'm at prisca's place with lily, no i am not bored of the place.
no NO!

i am bored about something else..
someone perhaps..?

o heck.. a waste.. all is just a waste!
i'll keep my things someplace where it'll collect dust..
just like everything else i have....
hummph!

penat laa.. adeh!
i should've just forget all about it.. FOR REAL!
hummphh!
i am REALLY looking forward to home.