Me and my bubble.

Ah, turned out I was in a pretty foul mood after all.
I did go for my flight, but I can honestly say that I wasn't my cheery self.
Although I did get my usual amusement by those passengers; one actually held up the plastic wrapped blanket and asked me what it was.

Anyway, I finally cut my hair.
As in cut it short.
And the last time I had it short was October 2007!
..and now it's even shorter than my hair then. heehee!

I really am not in the mood for anything right now. Other than picturing myself sitting in a bubble. Soundless with an exception of my favourite Blue October songs. Floating high above everything and everyone.
But here I am glued to the ground. With those songs blasted through my earphones.

To MC or not to MC..

--that is the question..

Congratulations to me, the letter says I'm a permanent flight stewardess; but I am transferred to Golden Lounge for two years. whoopeedee-doo-daa.
Such an odd letter to receive.
I guess I'm not in such a terrible mood now. At least I'll be among friends. We'd probably flip the ground around, backward and forwards. I'm already brushing my flirting skills since I was told that we could take tips now. Bahhahahah! Niat langsung tak murni..

So my last flight; for the time being, would be tonight to Hyderabad. I'm having an on-and-off fever, and a cough that sounds like a dog's bark.
I suppose I could go and get an mc.. I'm permanent anyway! And I haven't taken one this year.. but it IS my last flight.
So.....

So..?

The impending doom.

So I received my email.
Instead of being invited to a briefing, I was just told to collect and sign my letter of secondment to Golden Lounge by the 28th.

So yes...
I am going to be a ground staff (mostly) for the coming months.
We're supposed to get a week of flying, but who knows.
I was recruited to be a cabin crew and now we're told to be something else. Training starts next month apparently.
Oh, that QR secondment.. apparently it was only open for those who have been flying for more than five years.

I feel duped.
And low.
And I don't even know whether I'll be a permanent staff/crew/whatever until I collect my letter.
Yeah, whatever...

Called up to KCH!

Bumped into, and flying even -- with Cik Amyan yang tak update update blog diaa! booo!

♥~!

Josephine?

Jocelyn? Or was it just Sophie..?
I had a quick chat with a neighbour earlier yesterday. She initiated it, naturally. Very friendly of her, we had both wanted to check our mailboxes and turned out that ours were side by side.

I always find it amusing how some people are so unassuming of others and are able to be so.. open.
Like Encem.. most times. hehe
You can throw him anywhere and you can be sure that he'll soon have a friend. And a good one.
I suppose everybody has their gifts..

It's Kina's birthday today.. Dida picked me up and we went to Putrajaya to celebrate a bit with the family. My nephew could walk now..
And Papa and I hugged as we said goodbye.
I guess we're over the cold war. Five months is a bit too much..?
HAHAHHAHHAHAHA! Paling gedik, we were actually standing a little apart and he was the one who called me over. Oh well, might as well just get over it. Five months IS too much.

I've always been good at holding a grudge.. that's the part of me that is unlike a supposed-Sagittarius. Encem never condoned to that sort of behaviour. But everyone has their pride...
I am glad that I could hug my father again.. I have been missing him lately. And everytime anyone mentioned to me about my parents, I'd always get a pang in my heart.
Yes yes.. I am a HORRIBLE child!
So I pray that my child would not inherit that bit of me..

Morale is low all around.
Bestie too would be a permanent staff in the company should he decide to sign his new contract.
I can't help but feel like there's an impending doom waiting for me in the near future.
Have I not repeat it enough how I hate being in limbo?

With a heavy heart..

I think I saw Xtina for the first time today..
Didn't know if she knows what I look like so I just smiled and semi-stared at her.
Sorry for that bebbeh. Just read your blog; hope you'll get out of your funk soon.

It's been... a heavy-heart sort of day.
Encem told me what happened at his briefing and I don't know what to make of it. The good news is that he IS a permanent staff in the company. Bad news is that I used the word "staff" instead of "crew". I have so many things to say about this matter but I don't know if I should. Not in here, maybe.
What I can say is this; I am not so much in love with the company right now.

Anyway, I'm tired.. sleep deprived and incredibly worried, like a spooked cat after you'd just jumped out from a corner while it's relaxing under the shade.

Nothing much to share, just got back from a three-days Manila and Jakarta trip. Had a cool set crew, sedap kene ceramah dek leading every single day. Ceramah agama, so I'm good with that. I love being reminded about stuff like that. Makes me feel like God hasn't forsaken me despite me being ME.
Alhamdulillah.

Anti-inspiration.

I don't like taking care of another person.
Fact.
I'd like to say that being the youngest of the family contributed to this behaviour. I have an excuse for almost everything.
I am also not the type who talks to random babies. You know how some people coos and baby-talk to any toddler that crosses their paths. I.. just don't do that.
It is seriously weird how I am in this profession.
I am not friendly, nor am I patient.
I enjoy travelling. I love to laugh. I have an obsession with the sky.
My reasons to fly are purely and absolutely selfish.

Aren't I terrible?
I know I am.
As much as I'd love to make a difference in the world.. touch someone's soul.. I don't feel like someone who is capable of that when really, honestly.. I am just selfish!
Don't you hate me?
I know I do.

I'm so full of crap.

Of jealousy.

Encem and Bestie received an email to attend a "briefing" at the academy next week.
I on the other hand did not receive any invitation to this secret meeting.
I suppose it's not really a secret.. But as I was not included in it, it does feel like a secret to me.
The main point to this -- I am not wanted in that group.

AND IT SUCKSSS!!
I hate being left out!
And apparently it's regarding our contract.. So what, I'm not good enough to be a permanent crew???
EFFFFFFFFFF!!!!!!
Benci benci benci!!!
Fuck lah. Malas nak cakap dah. Somebody bang my head to the wall so I could forget about this!!!!!!!!!!!!

I did get an email about the new hairstyles though.
Apparently we can let our hair down now. It's going to feel weird if I do. I'd be excited about it if I am not thinking about that bloody briefing. Four sessions and I'm not in any of them, thank you very much!

Makes you think..
Maybe I'm not really crew material. Entah apa laa aku buat selama ni. Memain sangat kot.
Tak layak.
Time for me to act like this is nothing and it's not bothering me at all...

Went for a spa earlier. Jacuzzi, massage and a little facial. Kinda nice! The masseuse fixed the kink on my back and complimented on my skin -- waheyy! I'll be a bimbo for a while and dwell on that one sole compliment I got today!
Earlier, an elderly man offered to buy me a drink at Starbucks (which I declined because I had just bought one, and because he was STARING all the while and made me really uncomfortable,) but I couldn't take that as a compliment of any sort since Encem said he was practically hitting on every single female he saw. And yes, I saw that perverted twinkle in his eye. pffft!

After the spa, Encem and I somehow ended up in VIVA (even though we actually had Mid Valley in mind) and saw Prometheus. Throughout the film I just couldn't help thinking of its similarity to Alien.
==SPOILER ALERT!==
xx And yes, it turned out that the thoughts correlate. xx
Highlight the space between if you wish to read.

Okay, nothing else to share..
I need time to successfully deceive myself that I truly don't care about the current events. Sure, I'm happy for Encem and Bestie.. in a way. hahahahha! But this entry isn't titled "Of happiness," so yeahh...
I'm not exactly a nice person. I'm not great at faking feelings. Especially when I am writing MY blog. I'd never been a graceful loser. pffft!

So take note, I shall be in a very... very dark place for the time being.

Yack yack yack..

Kita google passenger lagiiii!
Well, kisahnye ex-PNH ada dua saja passenger. Sorang minah omputeh yang dah perabes buat muka dia to a point where she just looked OFF. The other was a guy that rupanya Malaysian.. Ye yee aku cakap English ngan dia, dia cakap Melayu ngan aku. Sebabnye? Dia kutuk passenger pompuan tu. HAHAHAHHA!

Borak borak sikit, pastu dia tanya aku ada boyfren ke. Aku cakap adaa.. then dia suggest nak jadi spare tire aku. HAHAHAHAHHA!! Aku gelakkan je.
Borak borak lagi, dia dah 50+ years old..
Adohai.. Old-man attractor lagi!

Aku nampak boarding pass for his next flight -- Kuantan, and made a comment on it.
Dia kata he's an ex-wakil rakyat in Kuantan. Aku cakap la Encem asal Kuantan. Dia tanya kat mana.. aku pon sebut sebut je la nama nama tempat yang aku penah denga Encem sebut. This passenger suruh cuba tanya Encem kalau kalau dia kenal siapakah dia since dia wakil rakyat for three terms.
HAHAHAHHAHAHHA!!
Aku sengih je part ni sebab obviously aku tak amek kesah pasal politics sangat.
Dia just cakap, "such a small world.."

So anyhoo.. using my usual technique of deflecting awkward conversations, I laughed it off when he suggested that we hang out since dia stay kat Cheras je. I don't know if that technique works for everyone, so don't try it unless you know you can pull it off. hahahha!

Balek rumah, aku pun Google lah pakcik ni.
And yes, he was a state's assemblyman in Pahang.. and seemingly is still a somebody in MCA.
AHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHHA!!

I'm sorry, this is probably wrong to say out loud but I suppose I understand how cabin crew; pramugari dan pramugara jadi "terlampau"..
It's just too damn easy!! HAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA!!

..not that I ever plan to be one.
...not unless the relationship that I'm currently in doesn't work.
..not that I ever wish it wouldn't.
..and really, I shouldn't be saying things like this when Encem reads this blog in secret. heehee

Anyway, three days off!!
And oh, a view from my office..

Wheee off day!

Okay, let's pretend that rambut aku yang sebenar macam ni;

HAHAHHAHAHHA!!
Walhal, langsung tak kan, tapi anyway.. aku rindu berambut pendek actually, tapi sebab rambut aku macam contoh di atas, *ehem* kalo aku potong nanti everyday lah aku nak kene blow kasi bentuk elok elok..
So kalau pikap aku kul 4:30 pagi.. pukul berapa lak aku nak bangun, ye dak?

Maka aku pon sedang berangan lah kalo rambut pendek..

Rambut paling kiri adalah rambut Emily Blunt, which is pretty senonoh kalau nak buat pegi keje.. Comel gak kan? hahahha! Rambut tengah empunyanya adalah Tabatha Coffey. Macam cool je rambut pendek gitu. And yang kanan, tak lain tak bukan rambut Halle Berry! hahahahha couldn't help myself..

Lagi rambut yang sesuai untuk waktu kerja ialah rambut Monique Coleman;

Paling best pasal rambut ni, kalau pakai lipstik merah, rasanya macam takde sape patut berani kacau aku. Rupa sangat evil! hahahhahahha! Senyum pun rupa jahat.
Anyway, to make any of this short hair happen, I suppose aku patut straighten kan rambut...

ICKK!!
Rambut Gisele Bundchen jugak best! Hahahhahahha!! (Tak dapat body, pinjam rambut kejap pun jadi lah..)

Oh, sedang sedang aku dok try rambut orang lain, aku terjumpa yang ini;

AHAHHAHAHAHHA!! Naseb baiklah rambut aku tak macam ni.. Kalau tak, tak semena mena kene tekel ngan Bestie. *jelir lidah*

Okay, enough vanity. Dalam satu entry ni je ada sembilan muka aku. Nak muntah pon ada..
I should find something else to do, obviously.
Tadi aku dah email my application for QR tu. Tapi aku rasa macam ada ala ala self-sabotaging behaviour, sebab gamba yang aku attach sangatlah unattractive. hahahha!

Oh well...

Oh ye! If any of you are interested to kill time by doing a virtual makeover of yourself, you can head to TAAZ.com.

Noi-Bai and back.

Thirty-something passenger on the way up to Hanoi.
I took the chance to sit at last row and enjoy the scenery. (Well, to nap at first but I stirred when I felt the aircraft took a descent. hahaha!)
As we were approaching the airport, I noticed that we were flying above the clouds! Even higher than the rain clouds that I could see the grey parts of the sky that was on rain.
And as we flew beside it, I could see a rainbow!

To see the rainbow from ABOVE it....
Sumpah sangat cool!!!!!!!
As cool as seeing the sun and the moon at a parallel.
Sangat sangat SANGAT cool!

Anyway, that's just a picture of how packed Hanoi is. It did cross my mind to take a picture of the rainbow, but I didn't want to miss enjoying it while running to fetch my phone. I suppose that's why I never considered being a photographer. I could never get the job done.

I did however chatted a bit with an actual photographer on the flight back from Hanoi. An English fella who was using Leica..
Aaaaah.. so jealous!!

What day is it?

I have totally and completely forgotten what day it is today.
Tuesday? Wednesday?
My body is totally worn out. I'd been working from the 29th with only one friggin' day off on the 4th! And tomorrow I'll be flying to Hanoi and back. uggghhhhhhhhhhhhhh! Seriously.. last night I fell asleep before 10, managed to get about 7 hours of sleep and still I was tired!
This - never - happened - before!
I've obviously overworked my body.. *sad face*

I suppose I shouldn't have been too happy about my plentiful off-day last month.

Anyway, I still hadn't submitted my application form for the secondment. Bestie had sent his through both email AND the actual form. Talk about knowing what he wants..
Mumu doesn't seem like going anywhere. I still think of her as a newly-wed, anyway.
Encem on the other hand is not all interested, actually been looking around for other jobs than flying. *pensive face* I don't know how I feel about that one actually.

I guess I am going to miss bumping into him..?
Also worried that he might fall for someone whom he gets to see everyday..?
Yes, coming to three years -- I still worry about those petty possibilities even when I say that I don't care. pffft!

I am not enjoying this topic, so moving on..
I've been pining for a cat lately. I don't know.. growing up having one is making me miss playing and curling up with one. But I know I can't handle one at the moment though. Living in an apartment, with a job where I can't ensure that the cat gets food everyday.. It'd be cruel. *sad face lagi* Just imagining this cat mewing sadly makes my heart break.

Anyway, in my (failed) attempt to save up, I actually spent about RM200 on O.P.I products the other day! HAHAHAHHAHAHHA!! I truly suck. I just can't help myself..
But I have awesome nails now! hahahahhahha!

Oh and because I have nothing else to share, I think this is the most awesome, prettiest handbag in the world!!

Of course, it's Louboutin so I'll spare you the painful knowledge of how much this pretty.. super pretty.. 20th Anniversary Artemis Plumes Python Shoulder Bag costs.. sigh.

Shall we move on?

The email for the secondment to alQatariah is finally here.
After talks and just talks of it, it's now official..
Bestie is excited about it. He is certain that this is what he wants.

I on the other hand is making myself confused by thinking about it.
I don't want to seem disloyal but at the same time I am curious about what's on the other side. I've heard of the not-so-nice working and living environment but the pay seems good. I suppose there is no harm in applying, right? If I do get through the interviews, then maybe I'll think longer and harder about going.
I'm letting Future Wanie to figure that one out.
Wishing that I have a way to contact Saloma now...

Anyway!
#crewlife :)

I was sorting out the cabin when a passenger handed me that the other day. When I was done, my supervisor reminded me to call the person. I asked her how did she know since she was in the galley.
Apparently she'd overheard the person talking to his friend; hoping that I would call..
HAHAHHAHHAHAHHA!!
I must seem evil to have laughed at the idea.

Other than that, nothing much is going on. My emotions are a bit whacked these past few days to be honest. Could be hormonal, or maybe I'm just angry inside and just not talking about it.

Be well, dear readers.