"I'm too sexy for a job."

Here's an attempt at writing as Paulo Coelho does:

I was sitting by myself at a cafe today. On the left side of my table sat the half-read book by Paulo Coelho that had helped me pass the time while on the right was a porcelain ashtray with a single cigarrete butt still emitting a faint smoke. My Moleskine was laid open in the center, hoping to be written with one of those rare words of wisdom or at least the words of a dream. Unfortunately its hopes wasn't met as my mind was completely empty.

It is mind-boggling how that always happens at the time I am most open for inspiration. Maybe Jean Anouilh was right;

Inspiration? A hoax that poets have invented to give themselves importance.
A word that us mere mortals tell ourselves and others as an explanation when we were struck by a momentary genius without sounding too proud nor vain.
It was when I got home that I thought of this, because for the rest of the afternoon I was contented by just staring at the bare pavement ahead of me.. seeing nothing particularly special as I thought of nothing especially particular.
----------
I was out for the entire day today (yesterday). To be quite honest, it's been a while that I've felt this busy. It's ridiculous since I did spend my entire afternoon at Coffee Bean! hahha!


I had a rendezvous with Bahijah today and it was nice. Just hung out for a bit and made ourselves weary everytime we mentioned the word; "work". Looking forward to make Ana just as weary next time! hahhaha!

Footnote: I am having the worst blister on my feet because my shoes were too cute -- naturally, it HAS to hurt. My body is such a mess, the nail on my thumb; DISGUSTING!

My darling delusions of grandeur.

In the ideal world, he'd be singing Lost as I sang Undiscovered. hehhe. But that's just in the ideal world. Ideality is just in our heads, unfortunately.

Have you ever felt like life is like chasing a closing elevator door? If you get in, things are great, but when you just missed it.. you could try pushing the button again but the door might not open. You've missed all your chances; the great things that could've happen while you were in the lift.. the people you could've met.. but all that was left to do was to wait for the elevator to run its course until it gets back to your floor again. So you wait.

I think I'm on the elevator, but the door is opening soon and I should get off so someone else could get to their floor. I feel like things are aligning this year; I get to travel around.. see my favourite football team.. catch a concert to the band I've always wanted to see.. won stuff unexpectedly.. Hardly any beef with anyone.. I don't get everything I want but I've got plenty!

I'm afraid to think that I'm attuned to the soul of the world, and the fact is just that I am one heck of a grateful person -- 'cause if I AM in harmony with the world.. I'm not ready to get off that elevator!! I still haven't done that ONE thing, so I need to be on that elevator still! God, please don't make me get off.

Maybe I could prolong my stay until I'm ready but nobody's that lucky, is there?
You know, for someone who is confident enough to do crazy things.. hardly concious of being stared at on the streets at all.. I talk A LOT about "luck".
I always have these mixed feelings. When I am doing well, with shoulders straight and my head up.. I'd say things like "confidence is ignorance" or that my confidence is actually me being an exhibitionist.
Seriously.. one of these days I need to give myself some credit! Even crazy people deserve a little credit when they're behaving, right?

Been listening to Apologize by OneRepublic recently. It's not a very good song to listen to on Raya. hahahhaha!
The thing about being too late for an apology though.. you know, you could apologize as sincerely as you possibly could and the other person could forgive you whole heartedly -- but the fact is, when it came too late.. the apology just didn't matter anymore. What was once important, no longer is. If what the two persons had was strong, they can pick up from where they had left it. But if it was shaky to begin with.. letting it go and moving on away from each other could be best.
There's a reason why wise men never mentioned about friends for-ever.

Wonderful Sunday.

Yes, you read me right.
I had a wonderful Sunday despite the sad entry earlier. I suppose I could say that a little retail therapy, a movie and good food is like Lithium to me.

First, Dida and I went to Midvalley to catch Bourne Ultimatum. Finally got the chance to see it. I know a lot of people have said that it's good but I think I'll be the minority this time and say that I wasn't particularly impressed. Yes, the acting was good.. the action impressive.. but I'd like it to be more.. wholesome. Oh, I don't know. It's a wee bit draggy and rather uneventful for me. sigh. It always makes me sad when I have to say that a movie had made absolutely no impact on me when I'm inclined to LOVE movies!

We walked around the mall looking for nothing in particular. I'm mentally and physically incapable of splurging on clothes, like I could for books (I know I'm a geek!) but I just bought some during the week, while Dida was refraining herself from buying anymore clothes for herself (or me, for that matter!) since she had already spend looaads this month!

So we left Midvalley and drove around KL.. until Dida just cruised into the basement parking of Pavillion. We hadn't felt like coming home yet and she hasn't been there. So we walked around, window shopped some more -- until I found the Dorothy Perkins belt I had wanted since last month! I've been looking for it since I got some money but they were out of my size.. but I got lucky today; just one more left! So I had to have it. heehee.
It's such a pain in the arse (and purse!) to always know what you want sometimes.

We weren't planning to get any dinner but then we walked past this place called Pasta Mania and I must RECOMMEND it!! The salad was incredibly crisp fresh (it's always ALWAYS a plus point when you can get a superbly fresh salads in a fast food place!), the tomato sauce was simply delightful (to us at least) and we can't help but adore the potato salad! (note: I LOVE potatoes.)
If you're a pasta maniac as I am.. it couldn't hurt to try out this place. Unfortunately you can only find it at Pavillion right now and their next store will open in.. err.. Gurney Plaza Penang in November. heh!


Then we went home, and at midnight.. we sat nervously in front of the telly for the Brazillian Grand Prix. What a drama! It was.. incredible! I've gained a new found love for Massa. So loyal to his team.. I wish him good karma!
Kimi Räikkönen won the championship by a mere single point! What an amazing ending to the drama it has been this year. I'm over the moon for Ferrari but upset for the fact that it was SUCH a baaad week for English sports. The football team would most probably miss out on EURO 2008.. The rugby team lost the World Cup.. and Lewis Hamilton failed to be the first rookie to win the F1 driver's championship.
Just a weekend for the Reds, I suppose; with Ferrari winning.. and so did Man U! hahha! That's good enough to keep me happy for a while.
Ooh! I'm also happy that Azraai liked Pushing Daisies!! So now I don't feel too crazy pushing everyone to watch it. (Watch it watch it WATCH IT!!)

It's Monday.. A new week! I'm going to start on a new book. The Alchemist was brilliant by the way. Such a simple story but Paulo Coelho was an amazing storyteller. Unfortunately I can't see EVERYONE enjoying the book. Somehow I feel that someone who isn't spiritual or religous even the slightest would find it hard to understand. Even I had a little hard time on some parts -- I'm almost agnostic sometimes. (Just on some things.)

Hope you guys will have a wonderful week.
I know I'm hoping for the same for myself.

I've placed links to Wikipedia on two words in this entry since I reckon you won't be too familiar with them. But if you'd known what Lithium and agnosticism were, I must commend you! Us Malaysians.. we don't get exposed to a lot of things, do we?

I'm furious but would you know it?

Dear,

I don't talk to you because you wouldn't listen. You said that I should speak to you but all you could hear were the things coming from my mouth, when I need you to listen to the things from my heart.

I don't tell you things because you couldn't respond. Even a nod would suffice but all you did was stare into space. I know now that it's impossible for you to realize that your incapability to say anything have always made me cry.

I don't speak to you because you were always so far. I wish you were closer but to be truth, I have always felt that you had more things to say than I do.

I can't share with you because you treat my stories as if they were yours, and that is the worst of all.

I know for a fact that none of you would even realize that you're the one I'm actually addresing but it's okay. I'll pretend that it's okay, like I always do. It's the story of my life. It never mattered how many friends or the number of family members I have. In the end, I'm always by myself anyway.

I've found the cause for my inhibition. There is a hundred and one.

It's been --- daaays.

And here's how little you've missed;

I went to get a passport-sized photo taken and as always; I HATED IT! They never turned out good and this time I looked like a fatty withholding flatulence! You know.. someone with a synthetic smile plastered all over their face -- highly unattractive! I HATE passport-sized photos!!

I shopped at Borders for the first time. I've always loved the store but I never actually bought anything there. Until the 17th; I blow my duit raya on three books; two of them were on my "To-read list". yeayy! But there goes my very short attempt at managing my duit Raya better this time around.

We celebrated Alia's 23rd birthday on the 18th with a BUNCH of people! That was real fun. Sliiiightly awkward at first but actually fun! Especially since I haven't seen the birthday girl for MONTHS! Johanz was awesome, I must say.


It was also a good distraction from the fact that England LOST to Russia that night. (Thanks for the score, Ilsa!) Maybe they lost because I wasn't in front of the telly but I'd hate to think that they needed me that bad. I refuse to be depended on as much! yeech!
Anyway, I can't hate the boys. I've seen the rerun; the penalty shouldn't have been given. Plus, it's cold in Russia! I'b be crappy in cold weather too. My heart is breaking nonetheless. I'll have no fun during EURO 2008 then.. unless miracle happens in the form of Russia losing in their next matches. hahha!

I've also been following the Rugby World Cup. (The Heineken ad never failed to amuse me.) The way all those grown men fight over a ball is ridiculously funny, I can't help myself. Looking forward to the final between England and South Africa (guess who's I'm rooting for!) -- also the Brazillian Grand Prix.. and the return of Premier League. hahahha!!

I went to a job interview which had felt like a real interview (I've been to three interviews before but I always feel silly everytime I walked out.) I think I did as well as the counsellors had taught me back in school (may I add that all the interviews I've been to had always turned out positive -- I suppose I'm oozing confidence in those situations) but I was particularly apprehensive and inhibited this time. I shouldn't have read The Alchemist before I entered the room. (Yes, I was that relaxed.) I just can't stop thinking about my Personal Legend (not that I've ever..) -- I even spoke about it during the interview when they asked "how do you see yourself in 3 years?"..
hahha! They shouldn't have asked, but how would they know that, right?

It seems like everybody is excited that I've been going to interviews. (Except me, naturally!) My family mainly were very curious. The thing is, I never told any of them that I was going to one; very different from my sisters whom had always asked our father to drive them to their interviews and sometimes even waited until they're done. When I got my job in Kinokuniya, I just came home one day and announced shortly that I have to go to work the next day.
I don't know why I'm like that. I'd like to blame my parents for my inhibition but I know they didn't do anything. You can call it "independence", but sometimes it's just too obvious that I'm different than my sisters.

I should've been built differently. Having mixed emotions always frustrates me. It'd be SO MUCH easier if I am driven by the need for money. The thing about my sisters.. Nina dreams of being a housewife since she was twelve. So she got married when she was 24. Dida had always wanted to be rich. She haven't had any financial problem since she landed her job. She's basically the breadwinner here. And I.. I looked up to the stars sometimes wishing for "happiness". I should've wished for something specific. Being happy is just too abstract, isn't it?
Please note that I don't hate myself. I'm just tired of being too me sometimes, that's all. Life's never easy and I never actually wanted it to be anyway.

I appreciate the interviews I've been to. In a way they're like something to do while they keep everybody off my back for a bit. They might've thought that I don't know what I want, but I do.. I'm just stuck. I know exactly what I want to do and exactly where I want to go -- I'm just not talking about it.
My sister mused on how a person who writes a LOT would keep SO MUCH while someone who doesn't write at all (that's her) could share exceedingly.

Then on Thursday I won a book from Football Crazy! HAAHAHAHAHA!! That was one of the most hilarious things ever.. yet cool! They said my name on telly.. waaay cool!! Can't wait to get my hands on that book. (Theo Walcott was the answer to the question they asked, by the way. I didn't win him.) See.. TV and football ain't all bad!


Had loads of fun with my sisters and brother in-law on Friday. Dida had bought a bunch of fireworks and WE were laughing so hard as we tried for perfection on our pictures. Timing is SUCH an important key!


Well, I think that's a LOT of things happening in the course of four days. I even had to leave out some just so I wouldn't be bored reading this again (as I believe you would too..) I shall have a lot more next week, be warned!!

Hope you guys are having a good weekend.
And Azraai, when I'm in love.. you'll know. So please don't guess that I have a boyfriend when I say that I have an "amusing month" again next time! It's demeaning! hahahhaha!

Question:

What made you read this blog?
A. Pure interest in what I've been up to -- and you read every word of it.
B. Pure interest in what I've been up to -- but you always skip draggy paragraphs/entries where I mostly yack about football or some other sport.
C. Curiousness for my past, where I would write it with wit/sarcasm when I reminisce about them -- which you find amusing.
D. My frequent psycho-babble or philosophical theories that you may or may not relate to.
E. Something else.. completely your opinion.

Do me a favour, be a doll and drop a comment at the comment link (at the bottom of this entry) and not the chatterbox. You can remain anonymous if you like -- not that I'd understand why, but what ever rocks your boat, mate!

Dida gave me a sodding flu on the second day of Raya by the way, the git! Then she bought me a really neat sweater before we went to see Now I Pronounce You Chuck & Larry which makes it all bearable. heehee. But I should be taking some time away resting and calming my nerves or I'll simply curse in between of my coughs.
I hope you guys are having a better week that I am.

Top 5 reasons to Jump Off The Roof By The 4th Day of Raya

5. Having my mom's cousins telling me that I made a big mistake leaving college.
4. The thought of reuniting with 3D modelling.
3. Getting lectured how experience is IMPORTANT and that degrees/certificates doesn't promise anyone excellence in their jobs.
2. Being spoken to like I haven't had a single reasonable thought in my mind.
1. Get all heated up yet unable to voice out my feelings and thoughts.. because well, you're not supposed to make a scene in the presence of the relatives that you only see once a year.

I'm not saying that I can't be lectured -- ever, but I am naturally morbid.. border line depressed. My rebellious streak is only a facade to make me look strong. That's the truth. (Well, it could be!) I honestly prefer getting my head blown up than listening to people telling me things that I already know.

Okay, it's not necessary for me to sound that suicidal by the way. So if you're actually worried about me, you could call this list; 5 Reasons to Leave The Country and Not Bothering Coming Home On Raya. heh!

Eid me.

Suikerfeest!
Now, I had only picked up very little of Dutch but Sugar Fest sounds a little sickly sweet for me. Cheery -- but sickly.

First day of Raya... aaaah..
I woke up in the morning and grumpily made myself presentable as the family would make our way back to Bukit Kapar. I haven't been excited about Raya for yeaaarss now. I guess it just wears off as you get older.

It's almost like how people say that suicide rates go up during the holiday season.. but since we're Muslim and Eid is obviously a religious celebration.. people just be depressed quietly. Maybe we'll jump off the roof next month.. y'know, after Syawal is over..
hahhaha! God, I can't even be sure if that was sarcastic or just plain morbid!

But the morning turns out fine. My father is speaking to me again after almost two weeks and a month. HAHHAHAHA! I know that sounds completely awful. I am an AWFUL child to have but I think I have a very intense relationship with my family. No middle grounds; love like crazy.. mad whole heartedly. heehee.
Ah well, no family's perfect. So happens that mine consists of two egotistical headstrongs. hahhaha!

It's always funny seeing the family on Raya. My father's side.. are rather sensitive people. Maybe it's a Javanese thing, I don't know but the whole room seemed to be in tears at one point. I laughed of course. It would make sense if the elders were the only ones crying, but there were people my age -- and even younger with red puffy eyes! It's.. amazing. Amusing.

My dad with puffy eyes after all the relatives had taken turns to ask for forgiveness. heehee
It's still applicable for me to get duit Raya apparently. I think it's embarassing. I don't deserve it but you know that I find all these amusing. I should try and manage the money better this time around.

A bunch of the family couldn't make it unfortunately. Work.. overseas.. other responsabilities.. I look entirely FAT by the way. Maybe I am.
On the eve of Eid, I'd spent it with Dida and Kak Freddy shopping for things that are completely inappropriate to wear on Eid -- unless you feel tube tops and sleeveless are fine!
We also dined at that place San Francisco Steakhouse -- which I would RECOMMEND!! Very good place to eat; good food.. excellent service (which is always a plus PLUS!) and killer drinks.
If you feel particularly adventurous.. take a chance on the Virgin Mary. It's a mocktail, so you shouldn't worry.. There's no alcohol in there.. just a punch.
Now.. I should be off celebrating more of the Eid -- with football!! GO ENGLAND!! hahahha!
*jumps out of the chair and settles comfortably in front of the telly*

It's incredible..

We'll be celebrating the Eid on Saturday. Just one day left of fasting! Time had never zoomed by as fast. Wow.. I've wasted SO much time!

I can't remember being obviously rude or mean in the past year so you won't read me apologizing for things I don't know of. Now, if I HAD done wrong to you.. please tell me. You know how to reach me.
I can't be sincere if I don't know what I should be sorry for, can I?

Some of MY apologies are in the mail by the way -- or will be! heehee. I'm simply better at writing. Apologies always make me laugh; it's my way of handling stress unfortunately. I laugh at serious things.

I hope you'll have a wonderful time during the holiday!
I for one CAN'T WAIT to be able to eat in daylight again! I've already made a list of things and places I want to go to eat!! hahahhaha!!

Happy Raya, guys!

I have a thought..

so suddenly..
how all the answers in the world couldn't make me any happier.

Being the pain in the ass that I am (and even worse to myself!), I always find my answers anyway. It's the curse of logical thinking actually! You should see the IQ tests I've done -- I'm not exactly stupid!

Some days I wish I was. (Lie lie!!)
Well, things would SEEM easier if you think less, don't you agree?

Maybe we are meant to never be satisfied. It's God's sick trick so we'd work harder.. try harder.. pray harder.. so we can achieve something BETTER than what's in front of us.
Improvement is always good, right?
Maybe it's only me who thinks this way. Or at least have thought of this. You would probably think about it after reading this.

It's sad when your basic reasonings blames you for everything wrong that has ever happened in your life. I for one can't possibly mess up my own head myself. I just hope that one day I could figure out what had triggered it all. It'd be interesting! (I should stop thinking that EVERYTHING is a learning experience! hahhaha!)

You've probably heard it.. or you probably don't, how they say.. "Semua yang baik datangnya dari Tuhan, dan yang buruk adalah kelemahan saya sendiri" ("All the good things had come from God, and the bad things are from my own weaknesses")
Not a very good thing to say.

Damn, I'm too philosophical for religion!

Pie-lette

Remember about this time last year when I yack about Heroes and now it turns out to be one of the best shows on telly? Well, this year I am going to talk about
Pushing Daisies!

If you ever get the chance to see it, PLEASE! It's such a wonderful quirky show and I love love looove it!

It is about Ned who has a gift of bringing back dead people to life with his touch and it's really funny.. and sweet (so sweet I could cry!!).. a little sad.. simply filled with quirky-goodness. (Well, I have to be fair -- I love quirks! I cursed the day I found out Wonderfalls got cancelled; which Lee Pace AKA Ned had also starred in as the brother.)
I can't tell you more than what I have because then I'd spoil the show's very own story telling.

The beautiful Anna Friel is the heroine of the show and she's got her own story! Very cool. I think she did well hiding her British/possibly Irish accent (as we'd seen her on Goal!) for the show. Not perfect, but well enough! Really like her as Chuck! heehee.

Anyway.. WATCH IT!
I hope one of the stations over here will get the rights to show it just so that more people could enjoy it.

Have a good day, everyone.

Let's go Devils!

*clap clap clap clap clap!*
Let's go Magpies!
*clap clap clap clap clap*

teeheehee. What a brilliant weekend for sports! Hamilton not finishing his race -- which made it a three-way battle between him, Alonso and Raikkonen for the championship winner, to be decided in the next -- and FINAL race of the season!
Manchester United scored their first FOUR goals in a match against Wigan after their single-goal spell for.. 6 matches since the season started. (yawn!)
And Newcastle United beat Everton 3-2 which is SUCH a relief! I especially love their second goal. It seemed like everybody (Smith, Butt, Owen..) touched the ball before Emre scored it. I must say though, the score should've stayed 3-1. I've said it before and I'm saying it again.. Given is NOT a highly convincing goalkeeper's name.
So that kind of blows. Plus the fact that Smudge have collected five yellow cards so he's going to miss the next match.
Who am I kidding? I am going to miss him in the next match! hahhaha!

MOVING ON!

I think it's a good thing that I've never been in Europe during autumn. I'm even crazy about jackets and coats while I'm in the hot and humid Malaysia! Surely it'd be a lot more awful if I was actually in someplace where they actually need to wear coats.

Ooh! I almost forgot.. The latest fall-TV is awesome! Especially loving House. heehee. Heroes ain't bad as well..

Okay. Haven't got anything else to share. To be quite honest, I think you've been reading too much of me.

Pronounce me dead.

I wish I wasn't as easily freaked out as I am.
I cannot tell how much I'd appreciate it if I was more.. ordinary.

You know.. the kind that listens to what they're told. Sure, bitch about it behind their backs but still.. do it anyway.
Some days I wish that I was less.. rebellious.

They say; love yourself.
Who are they anyway? How irrational they must be to love themselves no matter when. Can ANYONE love themself when they are on the right path to self-destruction? That would be incredible.

I HATE the fact that I can get all excited about the thought of working one day and get completely depressed the next. God, why must attachments bring me so much fear??
heh. Wouldn't it be fancy if I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder? It'd probably explain a lot. O shit. I think I really should get a psych consult.

sigh. Some days I wish that I have all the answers. But if I do, I'd do myself no favour as I recite;

Judge a man by his questions rather than by his answers.

Voltaire

OHH GOD! I've become boring!!

What a tiring day..
I had to go out so early in the morn without having a proper sleep -- almost embarrassed myself everytime I got onto the commuter train.

So earlier, I met a nice Chinese lady oddly named Sharmini.
Sharmini itself is NOT an odd name.. it's just odd for a Chinese, that's all. I didn't say that to her of course. I thought she was too nice for me to be myself. heh!
I also did a test to know how many words per minute I could type.. 43wpm!! I thought that was slow, but Sharmini said that was fast! heehee. Excellent!

I was around Midvalley earlier. But instead of delaying my return home.. fooling around or catching a movie.. I decided to do the responsible thing and get back to Shah Alam and return to school!
hahahha! Well, there's no real drama.. I just decided that it's time for me to collect my SPM certificate. Yess -- after 6 whole years! It had also been six years since I last went to my high school. Everything seemed smaller somehow.. and not at all as I had left it.

On a different note, Dida got into another accident this morning. I don't know whether I had lost my soul or my heart has turned into stone.. but my first reaction was to LAUGH!
Maybe that's her way of saying that that's her car. A psychotic kind of rite of passage.
I've passed worry now.
I'll just be my amused self and laugh at frivolity. I know that's what I do best.

Here's one..

I like to do things my way.
Pushing me into a corner would usually mean that you are willing to risk me fleeing the scene altogether.
Some days, I need to do things my way. Maybe it's because the Moon was in Leo when I was born! hahahha. My point is, doesn't matter how intimate my friends and family are with me.. the real things that goes on in my life.. They'd only know it when they do, and never before.
Am I making sense? Probably not.

Maybe it's a little insensitive and irresponsible -- which would usually lead to recklessness (heh!) but it's the way I roll.. bebbeh.

In a way, I'd like to blame my childhood for this. Being 5-6 years apart from my sisters, I never had a bestfriend while I was growing up. Play-mates, I have plenty! But somebody to talk to.. really talk to.. I never had one. And I'd never mess with the chemistry that my two sisters have. I dunno.. maybe it's just "the psyche of the youngest sibling".

You know.. getting bullied by your sister 'til you actually spoke of suicide.. (yeah, I went through that when I was EIGHT! How distressed/dramatic you must be to know about suicide when you're eight!) Somehow you just suck it up and well.. get pass that! It had always bothered me that I never had my own gang when my two sisters decided that I wasn't cool enough to be their sister that day. Probably that's how I mastered the art of Sadness! Constant practice! hahahhaha!

Good God! I hope I'll never be offered to do an autobiography!!!
My childhood seemed pretty dark, huh? Geez...

Anyway, do you ever see me work for money?
I can't seem to picture myself being driven by money. It's awful! I mean.. what else can actually drive me on then? Self satisfaction? Maaan, that sounds too goody-goody.
I hope I'll get satisfaction once I'm famous. *wink!*

--and I want you to know..

Ironically.. I actually keep my life quite private.
I know that the statement sounds quite funny. After all, I've had this blog for 5 years for God's sake!

But really.. do you honestly believe that this is my life?

I honestly wish that I was more open. Now you would think, "sure you can do that! Just open up and share.."
Perfectly correct. Except for the fact that when I start to, my head would immediately scream "SHUUT UUPPPPP!!! Big mistaaaake!!"

Damn.
It's just one of those days when I feel like I'm living a double life.
Not that I expect even half of you would understand...

I love football.

sigh. I know I don't need to say it (it's too obvious from my constant football-rambling) but I feel that I must say it. Know what else that I love? Bohemian Rhapsody. Maaan, I LOVE that crazy song. I just feel that the song is brilliant -- crazy sound, strong crazy lyrics.

Remember those times around the last World Cup where I HATED Christiano Ronaldo? (Hello, Stupid, Sore throat, Outing!) Well, I like him now. I think he's quite wonderful. It's horrible, I even like his voice now! And I can't help but felt for him as he bled just now.

I'm getting a hang of Facebook. I'm possibly having a little too much fun adding those 'applications' onto my profile though. I must blame my friends for telling me about it, and especially Kak Freddy and Kak Kole for inviting me to use all those silly applications! hisyy.. merepek, tapi main gak! hahahha! I'm actually trying my best NOT to add anything more that I won't be using.

I got a shocker in the mail yesterday.
hahhahaha! I swear, if I had known that registering to be a voter would make them send me junk mails and SMSes (no matter how polite they may sound,) I wouldn't have done it. hahhaha! Honestly, do I look like I give SHIT about POLITICS??
Well, maybe they knew I'd potentially vote for the opposition just to shake things up. (Very likely, I must admit.)

That's about it for the time being.
For my future reference: United beat Roma, one nil with Rooney scoring at the 70th minute. Awesome football! Sure, it's a different feeling when supporting a non-great team -- but to have supported a team that WON is always best. heehee.

edited on 1:57 PM.
Oooh! I forgot! Talking about awesome football; the most awesome football was on Monday, Aston Villa against Tottenham Hotspur. It was an INCREDIBLE football!! Four goals on each sides.. I have to feel sorry for the Spurs fan who went out of the stadium early when they were down by three goals. hahhaha! Shows that it's always good to have a little faith..

My friends,the career women.

--and man!
sigh. I am so proud of them.
Probably that's where I'm wrong. I SHOULD envy them, but I just feel an extreme pride for the fact that they've all grown up! hahhaha!

To be honest.. I should put as much effort into my Moleskine as I have on my blog -- and I know that. I am just.. letting myself to get stuck in this standstill.
Horrible, ain't it?

I'm currently trying out this Facebook thingamajiggy. Not sure if I can stamp it as "cool" just yet. I think I am more to confused with it.
Probably should play with it for a bit but heck! My The Office download is finally complete!! WOOOOOHOOOOOOOO!!!!! Let's go season 4!

Short lines.

1. Because I'm lazy and it's not like you're too keen to read my draggy entries.

2. Supporting a non-great team makes me wonder what they have done for me to gain my loyalty.

3. In case you haven't known.. my loyalty (and faith!) is BLIND. I'm an even sicker Backstreet Boys' song; As Long As I Love You. A criminal.. a wanker.. complete rubbish.. If I love you, I really do. 'Til the point I get my heart broken, of course. (Or bored.)

4. I have seriously funny friends. THANK YOU! You should know who you are.

5. I make a lousy football manager (be it only in fantasy) -- I practice favouritism.

6. Given is not a convincing name for a goal keeper.

7. The Japan Grand Prix was entertaining -- 19 laps behind the safety car; absolutely rubbish! I wanted drama, which fortunately I get after a while. The rain makes the race so much colourful!
Also.. Takuya Kimura was at the Toyota pits during the qualifying round! That was nice.

8. I miss Johma krab salade on that Blue Ribbon white bread. sigh. And Albert Heijn. double sigh.

9. I am open for questions if there's any. AHHAHAHHAHA!
Ohh, and there's no #10 'cause that'd be just too corny!

I don't get it..

If you disapprove of me so much..
what exactly are you doing here??

I understand perfectly of your tendency to use people. Me especially. Sure.. look me up when you're in need. I can honestly say that I don't mind the hate that I deserve, except for the fact that it came all too suddenly -- which is making you look like a complete hypocrite.
Being nice one day and a real jerk the next. It is... amazing.

Damn, why am I related to this.

My heart is aching.. My heart is breaking..
Thank you.

edited on 1:57 AM, September 29th 2007.
I'm upset when I'm upset... and I can't help at whom I'm upset with. I just find the need to retract my words once I start to let go of my temper..
But it's been there, so as you can see I've only struck out the entry instead of deleting them completely. heh.

Awwhhh!!

I wasn't planning on writing a blog entry today but McFLY's got a new single and video out!!!
I'm going to take a guess that Tom and Danny made the song. hehhe. I find those two are incredibly sensitive writers. Absolutely love them!

Watch The Heart Never Lies on YouTube
Some people run right into the fire

Do me a favourand break my heart

Not that it's hard.. I believe hopeful-cynics tend to get their hearts break the easiest. All you have to do is plant that seed and their own doubts in their heads will do the rest!
Oh wait.. did I just gave out the formula to break my heart? Oh well...

I've been addicted to Shayne Ward's If That's OK With You and Aly & AJ's Potential Breakup Song these past couple of days. Also.. Timbaland's Way I Are.
Obviously I haven't got anything much worth reading here, yeah? heh. But really... Aly & AJ's song is really really addictive! Love the catchy tune.

It's time like this.. when I get too much time in my hands.. or get left alone for too long, I'd always think of the strangers I've ever met in my life.
And I can't help it.. the first person I would think of was always Manir. He wasn't even the first stranger I've ever met, but he was definitely the best conversationalist among all. Indian, in his 50s, Aries. Really amazing person. He only initiated to comment on the neatness of my writing. heh. I don't reckon that he ever thought I was writing so I could avoid talking to strangers; expecting them to leave me alone. Glad that he didn't.

Some days I wish that I stayed on that train and continued our discussions about feng shui, horoscopes and religion. Just.. how amazing is THAT?? To talk to a perfect stranger about religion! No small talks there, my friends. Simply spiritual and philosophical topics please. (Now don't I sound like a snob? haha!)
Sometimes I feel like getting on the train in hopes of meeting him again. I used to have his picture in my/Dida's PDA but since it's gone nuts.. I've lost Manir. Well, just his picture. To be honest, I think his face is kind of cemented on my brain. What can I say.. Manir was the PERFECT stranger.

To have something in common with a friend is.. easy.
To have something in common with a stranger... what are the odds to that?

If there is anything I am most thankful of.. (mind, I should make a long list of it 'cause I'm grateful for a bunch of things!) it's that even though I wasn't born or made to be an exceptionally extroverted person, at least those who are had found my looks to be welcoming enough for them to strike up a conversation.
Maybe James Morrison was right.. they just seem to know who to talk to. It is odd when there's a roomful of people and somehow you're the one singled out -- but thankfully, I have no problem being singled out. heh.

Oooh!! Nina got a promotion yesterday which meant a big pay rise -- awesome!! Chilli's! Chilli's! Chilli's!! hahahahha! Damn, now I'm hankering for their Molten Chocolate Cake! -- and I'm not even that big of a fan of chocolate! grr.
Anyway, congrats Ninaaa! (If ever she comes across this.)

Of course, now that Nina's making big bucks, Mama had asked me when am I going to find a job. Way to go to spoil my mood, Ma! whoopee! *sarcastically*
Ohh, also.. The Magpies lost to Arsenal. bluergghh. It's embarassing because Arsenal was using their younger players while Newcastle was playing with their first team! I'm irked! Especially since currently, Coventry had scored against Man U. hahhahahaha!! (This is the NECESSARY laugh to keep myself from cursing. I think I need to do that a lot tonight.)

My darling rubbish...

You know, I've been spending too much time being bored lately.
I should be doing something better with my time. (Apart from finishing the books I'm currently reading -- A Place Called Here; isn't very gripping so far. I'm disappointed.)

I should write -- NO. (hahhahahaha!!)

I think I'm going to complete my travel journal later today and upload some pictures to my older blog entries! *faking a cheer of excitement!*
(Just the sound of those are actually.. boring me already.)

I'll write again when I see fit.

According to Wanie...

What to be among life's greatest mysteries;

Arjen Robben and Jose Reina are respectively aged 23 and 25..
Unless somebody tells me that they're racers during their free time (which would require them to wear helmets a lot!) I have to say that they're just TOO YOUNG to start losing that much hair.

hahhaha! I'm sorry.. I had planned of having a couple of "mysteries" but nooo.. I'm not too curious about anything else apparently. Okay, that's BULL. A day without questions would be.. EXCELLENT but I wasn't made for that, I've accepted it a long time ago. My point: just because I have questions, doesn't mean that I need to ask them, do I? Plus, it would completely ruin my pledge to not reveal too much of myself on this blog. hahha! (We all know that my incapability of holding a real promise is making me look like a pathological liar right about now.)

Recently I've realized that the more somebody says about love, the more I feel the need to leave. I know that doesn't sound right, but it's how I feel. I'm not saying that talks of love suffocates-me-so-I-must-run, it's.. when somebody talks about the dream it is to be in love, I'd feel like the world becomes larger.
I should be wandering out there. Heck, I should roam the universe! Finding MY true love... what ever that is. (sigh. All those astrology would've been a bunch of crap if I hadn't been such a restless soul to begin with.)

I just realized how upsetting it is to know that there is NOTHING or NO ONE that could make me STICK to ANYTHING. The weirdest thing; I've always wanted to pack my bag and leave without saying a single word to anyone. So I always wonder, don't I care for my family to have constantly thought of this?
Maybe I'm just a horrible person. It's easier to admit that than to psychoanalize myself again.

Maan, it's going to be October real soon. *this is the part where I curse*

Het is Maandag

Professional writers would suggest, "write like you talk".
Well, I write like I think; unnecessary, a little crazy, not particularly smart and seemingly never-ending.

I slept the entire day on Saturday, it's horrendous! I can't remember if I ever slept for an entire day before. I wasn't really sleepy as I was physically tired, I suppose. I had been out and about since early morning the day before, and had no sleep until around seven when I got a few minutes of shut eye.
Anyway, I found out that I'm easily saddened when I'm tired. Not particularly depressed or anything, just... blue.

It was a very social Friday;
I met up the Beasties for a bit, hung around with Dayat at KL Central, met up with Ana a little after Dayat had left, went to Pavillion and also read some books at the Borders store in Berjaya Times Square, get Dida to pick us up at 10-ish despite that she was with Kak Kole and Kak Freddy, sent Ana back to Damansara, went to Cathay Cineplex and saw Whisper, then back to Kak Freddy's house in KL.
All the while, wearing my new pair of high-heel boots.

I personally feel that the greatest agony -- yet, is breaking in a new pair of heels! Can you comprehend the silliness of anticipating PAIN but you do it anyway because there are just some things that you can't help but be (very) vain about?
hahahhaha! Well, you know what they say; it must look really nice to have hurt as bad. -- Which they ARE! ahhahahha! I had a couple of strangers to prove it.

As Ana had put it on her blog, the outing was pleasant but it wasn't perfect nearing the end (what with me almost falling down the stairs at the monorail station) but heyy, as long as you can still laugh about it; everything's gooood.

Think only of the past as its rememberance gives you pleasure

Jane Austen

I realize on Friday that I don't look good in Mango outfits.. ZARA, H&M and Dorothy Perkins -- ohh yeahh, bring it on! hahahha! Man, ...*finishing this sentence in my thoughts*

I showed Ana the astrology books that I like while we were in Borders. That was fun, getting a laugh at the flattery by some of those books. But we couldn't help being amazed by one of the books that had a pretty good description of me;

Being somewhat silly and odd, you have a liberal mind and a gypsy soul.. Your calling is to see and do things differently even if people don't always understand why.. This differentness is perfectly normal and has been part of the routine seemingly forever. To be honest, you probably wouldn't want it any other way. And here's my favourite part; Love proves highly unconventional for this Archer. You seek partner with brains, beauty and zeal who can share the stage easily.. Until you locate that person, being monogamous probably isn't in the cards for you. hahhahha!!
Basically.. I was born to be FICKLE! hahhahaha! It's awesome to know that I have something else to blame than myself. heehee.

It's been a good Sunday for football. The Magpies won after last week's embarassing defeat and United also won against Chelsea. I wasn't too happy with the referee though. There's just nothing worse than idiotic.. blind referees in a football match, but yeah.. my two favourite teams are the on top 5 of the leader board! I can't help but feel happy for that. (Just for notes, the Chelsea team was staying at the same hotel Nina and I did when we were in Manchester -- I recognized the grounds when I saw it on telly. heehee.)

Oooh! Dida bought me Cecelia Ahern's A Place Called Here the other day. I'm making myself dizzy by changing my read from that to Persuasion by Jane Austen. heehee.
Okay, this is a long enough entry I think.
'Til later.

I shall not talk about football..

I shall not talk about football. I shall not talk about football. I shall not talk about football. I shall not talk about football. I shall not talk about football. I shall not talk about football. I shall not talk about football. I shall not talk about football. I shall not talk about football. I shall not talk about football.

So...
I have a theory; everybody is charming when you're drunk -- or when you're in love. Scratch that. You'll love everybody when you're drunk! hahhaha!

It's been a while since I went to see a movie at the cinema so my sister and I went to catch Knocked Up last night. I must say.. I was pleasantly surprised. I didn't expect it to be.. as it was.
Although E! have been building it up as the "funniest movie of the summer", I don't think it was all that funny. It was -- wholly illuminating.

Personally, I had felt that it radiates the same vibe I felt when I saw Click last year (minus the watery eyes, though.) The movie was VERY interesting. They had some really good conversations in there which got me and Dida discussing about it waaaay after we'd left the cinema.
Enlightening; just the way I like my movies. heehee.

We find it a little slow, though.. so I suppose it isn't everybody's cup of tea. But I liked it. Heck, I might even love it! (I may be drunk.. hahahhaha!)

By the way..
United won their first Champions League group match!! woohoooo! I won the bet with Dida; who had NO FAITH in the team! Really liked how the Sporting Lisbon's supporters clapped as Christiano Ronaldo left the pitch -- they were.. a great sport! And! Van De Sar was amazingly quite impressive! Saha on the other hand, rubbish.
So my worries are happily diverted for a couple of days.. until Sunday, of course! heehee.

I shall not talk about football. Now.

European brands are funny..

I mean.. Why on EARTH would anyone want to get their clothes near a fire??

An honest tale speeds best, being plainly told.

Shakespeare

Writing is my refugehahhaha!! Can I be anymore cheesy?

My head has been pretty.. messy lately, but no worries! 'Coz I'm not worried. I just get this way every once in a while. Wish it has something.. anything to do with my womanly cycle but it's not.
Basically my head just messes itself up whenever it wants to -- and I shall spare you from my speech about my heart and brain feels and thinks what ever it likes as if THEY have their own hearts and brains.

Just checked my Football Fantasy points and man, I'm behind!! The top of the leaderboard has got 30 points while I have a measly.. measly.. *beeeep!*
(It's beeped because I'm ashamed of my pathetic points! hahhaha!)


Earlier, my sister had compared me to another blog she'd recently visit and she commented that it lacked the passion as I have in my writing. I can't help smiling. I bet Dida have no idea the pleasure she has given me with her words and how they are giving me a rather quiet sense of pride everytime I think of it. Thank you Did!

Just this afternoon I was thinking (while I was in the loo, naturally!) about my lack of competitiveness. Be it in a chase for something or someone, I'm usually the first to back away.
If it's simply because I am the sort of person who gives up easily, I think it'd be easier to understand and accept. But, as an example.. if it was in pursuit of a guy and I know the girl next to me wants him too, I would automatically stop; telling myself "aah.. she probably likes him more". If it's about an object, I'd think "he/she probably needs it more".
My lack of passion sometimes are terrible. Knowing myself too well; realizing that my tendency to get easily bored is VERY high -- KILLS my passion.

Hardly anything is worth a fight.. you know?
If I'm going to get bored with it in the end, why bother right? My indifference towards life is my worst vice. (And I must confess, I have MANY.)

I can't quite decide if it's my complete ignorance or my blind sense of faith that have always lead me away from commitments -- it's almost amazing.
About awful acquaintances;
a. why bother having these people around anyway?
b. I can always find others.
About school;
a. I don't need school to teach me the facts of life
b. other college drop-outs seems to find their own way!
hahhahaha!! My fickle mind.. I have no explanation for it but to admit that I am -- (as I've said two months ago) an easily amused, sarcastic cynic who unfortunately still looks up at the stars and makes wishes. (yet laughs at the mere idea!!) Maaan.. I'm too rational for silliness but I can't help myself.
Refer to the first paragraph of this entry.

Now, have I confused you with my confused mind?
If I have.. Welcome to the club!
If I haven't.. well, I'll try harder next time! Count on it!
I keep running away with my words that I hardly know what my first point was. sigh. This is baaad. (And yet, I'm not doing anything to stop it! hahahha!)
Ah well, maybe I haven't got any.

Dida bought Anuar Zain's latest album and I must say that it sounds good!! Well, of course.. we're fans of sappy ballads so naturally we loved it.

Three hours away from the Derby and Magpies match!
Go Magpies!! woot~!

Maan I need to stop spamming my own blog; entertaining my every whim and get back to my Moleskine!
sigh. Three and a half months away from the end of this year. NOW I'm worried.

Who is more to be pitied, a writer bound and gagged by policemen or one living in perfect freedom who has nothing more to say?

Kurt Vonnegut

edited on 4:32 AM.
Monday -- shitty day for football!!
I'm pissy here so.. read at your own risk.
The game is at the 75th minute and I can't stop thinking about the prospects of losing to Derby! Gile keji lagi jijik, tidak tertahan. Chances are NOTHING if nobody can kick the ball into the net!!
And excuse me, do you mind me asking; are you a striker, a midfielder or a bloody wanker?? I love you dude, but not enough to make me BLIND! urrghhh!
Good God! Might as well just turn off the bloody telly now.

La-la-la

As much as I hate to admit it, this ad is REALLY FUNNY!!!



That fall was really good!

A long time ago..

I wrote a little list on a tiny corner of my notebook;
of the qualities of the perfect man.

Years gone by and my idea of perfection have changed.
Maybe because I like different things now.. maybe because I've grown up.. or maybe I've grown weary of searching for perfection. Bottom line is, the qualities that makes a man perfect had become A quality;

and that is: he must not be infuriating.

Sure, I'd welcome an occasional spat sometimes; about the show we'd want to watch on telly.. where should we go for dinner.. what's the best football team (believe it or not, I wouldn't want him to support the same teams as I do!) or the ideal number of kids we should have. (You won't ever read me tell you how many!)
But he must not infuriate me.
Frustrate me all he wants.. Make me cry all he may.. but never infuriate me, por favor.

heehee. Obviously I'm in a slightly better mood since the last post; to write something as silly as this.

I was watching the qualifying round for the Belgium Grand Prix last night and found myself smiling at the excitement in the commentators' voices. They were telling the viewers to listen to the sound of the car's engine as they went through the Eau Rouge (which was the point where the track has a little dip and then go up to a 20% hill -- am I making sense here? Well, the cars go very fast through there with a somewhat sling-shot effect.)
Aaaanyway, my point actually.. What exactly am I supposed to listen to?? I know nothing about the sounds of an engine so what exactly is there to be heard? So I concluded, syok sendiri kot diorang nih. So.. self-absorbed, laughing at their own comments, while I grinned at their silliness -- until it hit me.

I'm doing just the same!!
AHHAHAHHAHA!!
All these times I get myself excited as I write about football and even Formula 1, I am no different than those self-absorbed commentators.
Ah well, suits you to have come to my blog! Suits me for watching their show. hehh!

It's been a good weekend for sports. (Good, is relative. hehh!)
Lee Chong Wei won the Japan Open, (thanks Dar for waking me up to catch it -- unintentional though it may be) Manchester United won against Everton through si manja Nemanja Vidic's header. Chelsea had only managed a draw. (hahhahahah!!) The two Ferrari got podium, (I shall not comment about that Ferrari-McClaren spying-stuff verdict) and I bet Tiger Woods will maintain his lead in the Tour Championship!
ha! Now aren't I the sports buff? heehee.

So here's a little advice for those of you who hadn't noticed the pattern yet..
If you're not into sports (football and F1 especially) you might want to AVOID reading this blog during weekends. Then again, you might want to STOP READING this blog altogether 'cause sometimes, it's ALL I ever talk about!

Can you tell that my dark mood has returned?

Spare me from you.

I am killing myself with my thoughts again.

A spate of words hijacking my entire mind.
If this is news, I couldn't tell what you've been reading.
It's frightening to think that despite all and everything, one's core had seem unchanged.
I am.. as I've always been; unfocused yet preoccupied.

Have you met a restless soul such as this?
Angry for not one reason.. Frustrated by one's own expectations.

You cannot transcend what you do not know.

Sri Nisargadatta Maharaj

I probably should write about depression then.

Thank you, Ma.

For the camera phone you gave me exactly nine months ago. heeheee!


You know, for someone who always finds the time to profess one of C.S. Lewis' slightly melancholic quotes at one's liberty, I seem to have a bunch of friends lying around.

It was unplanned, but I met up with Ana and Bahijah and hung out at One Utama on Wednesday. It was nice! (When have you EVER read that I was bored when I am with my friends, really?)
The two are definitely growing up; with Ana going to her very first job interview earlier in the morning (hope you'll get it, Anaaa!!) while Bahijah going to start working (for experience's worth, as we all would put it) next week.
I am feeling.. so proud of them! ..and slightly behind, but oh well! It's never been a competition to me. (heeheeheee! *inside joke*)

We completely lost track of time and by seven we had to part ways.
My sisters came to pick me up from KL and we headed straight to Seremban with Dida driving like a maniac. The Kiddies are having a fever.. it doesn't suit them.

Now.. it's just under an hour away from the EURO Qualifiers match between England and Russia and I'm REALLY looking forward to it! I miss my football. Hopethey'dwinhopethey'dwinhopethey'dwin, HOPE THEY'D WIN!!!

So you Muslims out there who happens to read my blog.. have a good Ramadhan, yeah?
Now don't go doing things I won't do in daylight! hahhahaha!

Friendship is unnecessary; like Philosophy, like Art.. It has no survival value; rather it is one of those things that gives value to survival

C.S. Lewis

edited on 5:08 AM.
WE WON!!
Sweet.. sweet victory.
I take back all the bad things I've ever said about Owen. Sure, he just waits on the ball but obviously he's excellent at finishing. It was a BRILLIANT match! One of the best I've seen England played, without a doubt! Could've -- SHOULD'VE scored more but I'm pleased.
Fifteen wasn't sent in but it's okay.. I like winning better, I suppose! hahhaha!
Now.. on with the Premier League!! YEAHHH!!

"I have a boyfriend -- aaah!"said Dayat

I suppose I should admit that the week has been pretty eventful for me. (In comparison to the blah days I've had in the past weeks, obviously.)


Went out with the Beasties on Tuesday.
I think we could all agree that it started pretty boring. Seriously, we weren't talking much, nor did much. It was turning into one of those awful car wrecks you saw at the side of the road. But maybe it's just me.. (Which it probably was.)
I don't know why..

Well, to be honest.. it was most probably because my heart wasn't fully in it -- or even there to begin with! And for that, I don't entirely blame myself. heh!
It was when we were pretty ready to head back home when we all got our mojo back. Something just clicked as Dayat and I were standing in front of the sausages cart in Cold Storage; right after the sales lady offered to steam the sausages if we'd wanted them. hahhahaha! That is one BRILLIANT sales person!

So we bought 500 grams' worth of snacks in the form of chicken sausages and slices (and got another hundred grams free!) We ate some ice cream while we waited in front of the store as the sales lady heats the sausages.
Basically, we had a small picnic in front of the Cold Storage in Berjaya Times Square at half past six.. and that was FUN!


Might be going to Seremban later today.
Extremely anxious about the England match with Russia tomorrow morning!
Mentally unprepared for Ramadhan starting this Thursday. Boy, time flies. Shit! (Note to self: SHOULD cut down cursing for one month!)
I'm getting worried about things but I won't say about it again as I'm beginning to feel like a pathological liar everytime I say what my plans are to FIX it.

Have a good day everyone; one with no life-defining-decision-making sort of day!

edited on 3:15 AM.
The blog looks fine on 1280 x 960 resolution now.

Mentally taking pictures.

Barely four hours of sleep - wake up at 9 - hardly 30 minutes of nap in 39 hours.. and multiple auto-shutdowns.
That was -- my crazy weekend.


The day started alright. The weather was nice as Dida and I was driving through Putrajaya to get Kak Kole and Kak Freddy. It took us barely an hour to arrive at Port Dickson. We set up the tent, took out all the stuff we've brought.. the cooler.. and Dida LEFT! Yeah, she left me with Kak Kole and Kak Freddy because she got a late invitation to watch the Malaysia Cup finals at the stadium. (hahha!! Perak lost! But damn, Kedah won the treble!!)

Naturally, I took out my UNO deck and started shuffling. hahhaha! I believe UNO brings people closer! Seriously. I'm starting to consider of bringing that deck EVERYWHERE I go here! heehee.



Around 6, Kak Freddy suggested that we'd bring her rubber air mattress out to the water and test it out. So we changed into our swimming suits and carried that silly little thing to the ocean. Kak Kole was the first to jump onto the mattress and it was HILARIOUS that Kak Freddy and myself was laughing SO HARD! Then I jumped on. Kak Freddy didn't want to get on at first but Kak Kole and I persuaded her so she did! It was.. just histerical. We were laughing and giggling like manic school children.
We floated around.. Paddled about.. It was funny. There was one particular moment when we got a little to the middle that reminded me of P.S I Love You. Wish I had a waterproof camera right then but I figured, maybe taking pictures with your head isn't too bad. heh!

As the sky turned dark, we returned to our camp and started to light the fire. It took a while but it was greatly satisfying when we got the coals to light up. Really cool! We ate and then just.. hung around. Doing nothing much. It was too dark to play UNO anyway! ahahahahha!!
Except for the part where we had to move the tent because our neighbours were unfortunately a bunch of inconsiderate, loud, annoying, moronic little assholes. The worst part, among these little a-holes, one of them was called "Wani"!! (Notice that I dropped the "e"? I'm irked enough to share the same name, I pray that her's wasn't spelled the same way too.)

By twelve, my soul source of amusement was watching Kak Kole in tingtong mode and being the serial pisser that she was. hahhaha! (Also, having Ilsa to update me with the England vs. Israel scores!! Way cool!! -- England won!! My baby didn't play but WE WON!!) Kak Freddy fell asleep for a bit until Dida came back around 2 a.m bearing KFC!!
So we all just sat around and ate as Kak Freddy and Kak Kole complained about the a-holes we'd encountered throughout the day to Dida.

I think it was four-ish when Kak Kole and Kak Freddy went to sleep in the tent as Dida and I laid on the matress outside the tent just staring at the sky and talked. Dida got sleepy around five though so I was left with the mp3s and sudoku in my phone for two hours.


It was seven-ish when the rest of my party woke up (well, I woke them up!) and started packing. We wanted to have a bit of swim and honestly, the seabed of the beach where we camped at was revolting! (Yeah, we saw the icky stuff we stepped on when the sea level decreases during the night.) So Dida drove us to the place where we usually go with Nina and the kiddies.
It was fun! Could've been more fun if we found an air pump to inflate the air bed since the one we had wouldn't work anymore.


It was half past eleven when we made our way back to Putrajaya. Kak Freddy invited us to the little get together at her parents' home. We spent an extra hour on the road when we somehow missed the exit somewhere but it was worth it. The food was good! hahhahaha!
Dida was driving around with a towel on her head, by the way.


Ohh! At Kak Freddy's house, we hogged her brother's computer for a bit and I found out that my blog's layout wasn't right!! It bugs me how the background repeats itself on the LG Flatron Wide screen with 1280 x 960 resolution! It blows!! For your info, my blog looks best with 1024 x 768 resolution, okaaay?
But you must know that one of these days I shall tweak the background so it'll look alright for visitors with bigger resolutions. arghh! Why do I have to be so anal?! God!


Afterwards we headed to KL and hung out at Kak Freddy's house. That's where I got a little shut eye. So did Dida. We left at almost seven and by then the weather was getting bad. (So was the traffic!)
This was about when I kept falling asleep. It was slightly horrifying, not remembering shutting your eyes and suddenly open up to heavy rains or an unrecognizable road. sheesh! Obviously, 32 hours was too much with only four hours of sleep two nights before.


Now, that was NOT shaky hands! It was plainly.. the awful weather!
We picked up Mama at home and had dinner at Windmill in Subang Jaya where I -- unfortunately (yet naturally) had to fill the comment card with sarcasm.


Then we all went home to Shah Alam where the sky was in a freakish shade of colour.


Now that was a long entry, wasn't it?
That should keep you guys preoccupied and off my back for a couple of days, right? heeheehee. I'm sorry if the entry is a little draggy and yet simplified in some parts. It's already 4 a.m and I'm supposed to meet up my friends in the afternoon -- I'm still tired from the weekend!

In truth, my weekend wasn't all exciting and "perfect".. but why dwell in the bad, right?

I won 47 cents!!

The lack of sleep is making me feverish but heck, I think I'll blog first before I hit the sack.

Had an excellent day with my friends today!
I only had a few hours of sleep before meeting up with Hanis and headed to Subang Parade (because we haven't gone there for ages!) Unfortunately Dayat had to bail at the very last minute because she remembered that she had a midterm paper today!! ahahhaha! Typical dayat.


Ohh bulatnyee.. *curses*
We didn't do anything much. Just window-shopped, had brunch.. a piece of cake and talk. Really.. nothing much. I barely knew what we did exactly for SEVEN hours before Bahijah, Ilsa and Ana came and joined us.

We went back to Secret Recipe just to hang out and killed time with nothing else but.. UNO!! ahhahaha!


Hanis getting sucked into the competitive game of UNO and an excited Bahijah after winning a round.
Hanis had to make her way home just before seven and afterwards the rest of us changed location to the Subang McD and played more UNO. Seriously.. we need better things to do with our time!
Anyway, for our final game, we decided to put some money and I ended up being the winner!! ahahhaha! Way cool! 47 cents!! There was supposed to be a couple of ciggies too but I don't know what happened. I only end up with the money. Well, that and a tiny piece of precious tin foil!


A little more photos on my Fotopage later. (And I do mean LATER!)
I had fun. Hoping to get some more of that before the start of Ramadhan next week!
Goodnight everyone, and have a good weekend. Thanks for reading my blah entries! heehee.

I was happy in the haze..

of a drunken hour..
Oh heaven knows I'm miserable now
The Smiths are stuck in my head again.

I burnt myself a little earlier.
You would think that getting my thumb caught in between the car door was foolish enough, but nooooo.. I had to burn myself.
Awesome!

It's been a pretty slow week here. Nothing much has been happening. (NOTHING has happened to be precise.) Blah!
Nothing's going on with football.. except maybe that Perak is meeting Kedah for the final Malaysia Cup this Saturday. I hope Perak will win; (despite they're historically the biggest rival to Selangor!) my mom's from Perak anyway. But mostly because I don't want Kedah to win or they'll achieve a treble win this season thus making Selangor's treble a few years ago less -- special. hahhaha! I wouldn't want that!!

Also this Saturday, England is meeting Israel for the EURO Qualifiers and I am going to miss it. Dreading it a little, naturally but it's probably a good thing. I stress-easy when I care too much and obviously, I do.

So what am I going to do this Saturday?
Well, I was invited to a picnic/camping at the beach by Dida and her friends! I said "no" after Dida told me how she plans to disappear a bit that Saturday but Kak Kole had wanted me to come.. And I'm just too flattered to stick with my "no". hahhahaha!

Other stuff.. been liking Marie Digby recently. She sounds nice. It seems like everyone is getting noticed on YouTube these days.

Blah. I'm really bored now. Going to watch the England team training on FA.com now. Aren't my life exciting?
Ohh! To be fair.. I am excited about meeting up my Beasties this Friday!

Suddenly remembered something Dida mentioned to me in the car earlier. It was a jumbled up quote she heard somewhere so I looked it up. I'm afraid I have to admit that the idealist side of me can't help but believe;

When you aspire for something with passion, all the universe conspires to make it happen..

Paulo Coelho

Lights in the sky.

I honestly have no idea what I'm going to write about tonight.
Alright.. fine.. HONESTLY I do have things that I CAN write about. Just not necessarily of things that I really WANT to write about. Am I making sense? Probably not.

Picture taken with my amazingly horrible Sony Ericsson that takes shitty pictures with the lights on and the subject is only at arm's length from the lense.
Went to see the final fireworks-fest at Putrajaya earlier tonight (well, last night exactly) and I must say that it was quite dull!! Comparing Pyrofest Canada with Team Japan or even Team Italy.. blah! Maybe it's the weather.. maybe it's the change of location where we see it from.. Maybe we've seen one too many to be as easy to impress.. I don't know. Maybe it's just BORING.

We sat a little closer to PICC this time that we managed to catch the music that goes along with the fireworks -- pretty cool! They were really impressive and funny sometimes.


That's it for tonight.
I don't know exactly what I'm going to do after this but I probably should rest. I'm feeling extremely tired despite that I haven't done anything much through out the day. hmm..

edited on 3:05 PM, September 5th 2007.
I forgot..
Aston Villa beat Chelsea during the weekend. hahhaha! Way cool! Premier League will take a short break 'til the 15th for the Euro Qualifiers. I don't know if I'm glad.. Also.. Solskjær had retired just before United's game during the weekend due to his knee injury. It's sad.. (Fine, he's actually getting pretty old to be a footballer -- but he looked so young!) I didn't even get the chance to sing his song!
And Australia won the MIFC! Darn, wish I hadn't missed that one!
Oh ohh!! I forgot one more thing.. Dida and I saw Fracture the other day and we loved it. It's a very smart film. A little on the slow side but VERY interesting!

I'd rather have you fat than dead.

I haven't got anything to share. Especially NOTHING that relates to the title up there.

I had a stressful night as I watch the Man U match and the delayed Newcastle match on telly. Not entirely because of their missed chances, but having Dida who was an incredibly annoying and irritating human specimen when she wants to be.
Babe, enough with the yellow already!

I was bored...

So to stop -- (more like dawdle) myself from going into the kitchen and find something to stuff my face into, I decided to try out that Fantasy Football thing I've been hearing from my new favourite show on Star Sports; Football Crazy. (Good show, love the hosts!)

Want to know what I found out?

I found out that I can only manage a top football team where money is no object and where I can splurge on the best names I know. Seriously.. they gave you £55million and it isn't enough!! I also found out that I've been favouring a lot on midfielders and strikers that I simply cannot choose a single defender!! Okay, there's Ferdinand.. but I need three more!!

Still.. I'm looking forward to the start of the game which is on the 15th. I'm very keen on how the jumble I called "team" would do!

Blah~ I must be boring you.
But you should know by now how uninspiring my entries are when I'm uninspired.