In a mood for sad songs.

Hung out at Kino 'til 10 again yesterday. My eye had been really droopy by that point, but I had a really good time with Lilian and Angel!

Angel was really funny yesterday. Okay, getting shouted by her over a joke was not really fun.. but we were laughing about it soon enough so it turned out to be really funny.

Lilian gave me a pretty good talk. Funny that earlier that morning, Kak Wati told me that Lilian was slightly upset that I didn't tell her about the stuff I told Kak Wati. So I did that night.. and she had been really.. spiffy! (heehee! -inside joke.)
Should miss her most when I'm gone.

Yesterday I got a message from Bahijah! She saw me in Kino and was afraid that I'd get mad at if she came up and said hi. *sigh* She should've just came over!! grrr.
Only realized how much I missed talking to her..
Aren't I just the stupid egoistical idiot?

Falling out is so much easier than falling in.. and I had to have that stupid ego creeping about.
I honestly don't know half the things that made me not talking to my old friends.. I really don't. And I never try to find out why, simply believing that falling out was inevitable. Geez.. why am I SO the way I am?

Not feeling like I'm on top of the world now. I wouldn't be too surprised if I spent the whole day cursing at myself for having too many communication breakdowns since the last 8 years. My communication skill really blows!

Elsewhere by Sarah McLachlan

I love the time and in between
the calm inside me
in the space where I can breathe
I believe there is a
distance I have wandered
to touch upon the years of
reaching out and reaching in
holding out holding in

I believe
this is heaven to no one else but me
and I'll defend it as long as I can be
left here to linger in silence
if I choose to
would you try to understand

I know this love is passing time
passing through like liquid
I am drunk in my desire
but I love the way you smile at me
I love the way your hands reach out and hold me near
I believe

I believe
this is heaven to no one else but me
and I'll defend it as long as
I can be left here to linger in silence
if I choose to
would you try to understand

Oh the quiet child awaits the day when she can break free
the mold that clings like desperation
Mother can't you see I've got
to live my life the way I feel is right for me
might not be right for you but it's right for me

I believe
this is heaven to no one else but me
and I'll defend it as long as
I can be left here to linger in silence
if I choose to
would you try to understand it

I would like to linger here in silence
if I choose to
would you understand it
would you try?